Rating: Adult overall
Disclaimer: I don't own any of the characters in this story,
and make no money off them.
Summary: Xander hits the big city looking for excitement and a certain vamp
Xander turned his back to the scantly dressed, very happy
bartender and tightened his grip on his beer.
'O.k. Xanman deep breath You are in a gay bar.
All these men are gay.
They serve gay beer to other gay men.
They just served me a gay beer and I am drinking it.
Holy shit it must be true. I must be.....
Well, really no surprise, kinda knew, so, still,.....
Spinning back around on the stool Xander again faced
the gay beer serving man.
"So you don't know Spike? He doesn't work here?"
The bartender shrugged and started wiping down the counter top.
"Nobody by that name works here. Sometimes, though,
people don't always use their own name. Describe him to
me and maybe we can find you somebody that matches that
Sounded reasonable. 'Damn, they should turn down the
air conditioning'. Xander couldn't help notice the way the
bartenders nipples puckered and stood up. Course that was
probably only so noticeable since his chest was totally smooth
and hair free. Wonder if he shaves, waxes or is just naturally....'
"Huh? Oh, Yea, description. About 5'!0" maybe 150 lb. pale skin
blond hair, tight body, strong arms, baby blue eyes, soft looking mouth,
killer cheek bones, firm butt, always wears snug black pants and shirt.
Guess that's about it. Sorry I can't give you any more detail than that.
So, sound familiar?"
The bartender laughed and pretended to give it serious thought.
"Well that's a pretty vague description, but it could be William.
Just one thing you left out. Is the guy you're looking for a vampire?"
Xander spit his mouthful of beer with projectile force that hit Mr.Mega Watt
directly on the chest.
Staring in shock at what he had just done, Xander thought
briefly that he was grateful the bartender's skin was bare.
That would have been a hell of a cleaning bill.
Grabbing the bar rag Xander reached over and frantically
started wiping down the foam covered slippery body. Taking
extra care to dab the sticky beer off that was dripping from the tips
of those two perky nubby little......
"Sorry. Sorry. Wow you must really work out. You are in great shape."
The bartender took the rag from Xander's hand and slowly, sensually,
rubbed it up and down presumably to clean himself off.
He then slid the cloth all the way down his chest till it disappeared below the
vantage point of the bar.
"Yea, I really am aren't I. So, looks like you need another beer"
Amazingly, the smile never waivered.
"Thanks, sorry." Xander slapped another $20. on the bar.
It hadn't occurred to him that he had already paid the same for
the last two beers.
One of which Mr. Pointy was still massaging off with his hands
while Xander watched, awe struck.
After taking a big swallow from his third bottle, Xander was finally feeling
the familiar buzz slide up to his brain and he began to relax.
"Yea, vampire. That's the one I'm looking for. You got
a lot of vampires work here? Not that I need a lot of them. Only
want the one is all."
"Well I believe the one you want is William. William Sirrah. Only
if you are wanting to get a little physical tonight I gotta warn you, he is
not one of the workers here. He is a card dealer. However, if you are
interested, we do have a back room and any of the waiters or
bartenders (wink wink) will go in there with you. You tip them the set
amount and I guarantee your satisfaction."
"No! That is not what I came here for.
No! I only came to find Spike!
Any of the waiters?"
Xander tried as subtly as possible to glance around the room
at the waiters who were bustling about lifting, bending, serving, smiling,.....
"No! Look, just tell me what time Sp.. William gets here."
"Well obviously he can only work the night shift so he is usually here at
8p.m. and gets off at 4 in the morning. You want to hang around for a
couple more hours and try to catch him? Drink another beer maybe?"
The exchange was becoming automatic.
Slap - the twenty hits the bar.
Clink - the bottle takes its place.
Bartender smiles - Xander drinks. The world rolls on.
"So, you know about vampires, huh?" Xander was pleasantly fuzzy and the
information didn't seem near as shocking as it had when he had first received it.
"Sure. We have a few that work here. Also have a couple other minor
demons working in the dishroom. No big deal"
The fact that the bartender had never waivered in his bubbly personality
now had Xander wondering what kind of demon he might be.
Was there such a thing as a demon that has way to many teeth and
gives off a mysterious aura that causes innocent beer drinkers to suffer
painful hard ons?
Cause it sure seemed the closer he leaned over the bar towards
Xander the harder his dick got, and there just couldn't be any other explaination.
Beer drinking had always been the source of deep thought for Xander and
he was now contemplating several issues that were pressing heavily on him.
First, he had to piss like a Russian race horse.
Why a Russian race horse?
Do they piss more than American race horses?
Second, No way could he piss like any type of horse with a stiffy like he was
So spanking the monkey was probably going have to be the
order of the day.
Snickering at the thought that he had a regular zoo traipsing
round his head and bladder, he set his last empty bottle back down.
"You got a bathroom around here?" Xander tried to focus his eyes on the happy
server of the gay beer.
"Sure do. Right over there under the big sign that says "Restrooms"
Need a hand with anything?" Mega Watt wagged his eyebrows.
"Hey!" Xander huffed and slipped clumisly off his bar stool
"I'll have you know I have been abusing myself for years. The last thing
I need is for someone else to stick their fingers in and muck it all up"
Stumbling away, Xander located the bathroom and rolled in. Standing
in the first stall he was finally able to undo the uncooperative zipper and free
a very hard cock that was clearly happy to be out in the open air.
Leaning in with one hand against the wall and the other on his cock,
Xander looked down at his dick and decided it was time to demand some answers.
"Just what the fuck is your problem? There aren't any women out there,
and you have No experience with the man lovein' thing.
Have you been drugged? Shame on you! I try to take you out with me
and look how you act. Drooling all over my pants and forcing me to take
you in hand. O.k. buddy, we're going to do this, but don't think it's cause
I want to."
By now his outrage at the improper behavior being displayed by his errant
cock was disapating. He had to admit it did feel kind of good to slide his
hand in the juices his cock had so generously supplied. How could he stay
mad at it when it was thoughtful enough to help him out like that.
"Oh, Yea" Xander groaned. Problem was, an alcohol fogged brain did
not always work as willingly as a beer soaked cock.
It's just biology.
'O.k.' Xander thought. Buffy - yea, nice.
Buffy naked - um, no, put the clothes back on.
Anya - no, not going there again'.
His hand was still stroking and the feeling was definately there, just not
Xander squeezed his cock, reaching down with the other hand and rolled his balls.
Unconsiously humping his hips, Xander spit on his hand to add to the slick and
sped up his movements.
Think Xanman, Think! Maybe I need another beer. Oh God, maybe smiley
would bring the beer to me in here.
Shit! He could hand me the beer and accidently spill some of it over my cock.
The cool beer would feel so good on the burning hot head of my dick'
Xander bent over and stroked harder and faster.
'Course then being in the service industry he would feel responsible to
clean it up. He would drop to his knees and take my cock in his mouth.
He would suck the foam off my cock and the come out of the slit.
Both would taste bitter and salty.'
Xander ran his thumb over the head of his cock.
He closed his eyes and pictured those full pink lips covering those big white
teeth to protect Xanders precious appendage from damage.
"Suck me big guy, suck me"
Releasing his balls Xander slid his hand backward. He continued to pull,
twist and squeeze, Spreading his legs further apart he scratched his fingernail
over the soft puckered entrance of his ass feeling the hole flex and release.
Suddenly the face in his mind changed from a smiley, toothy bartender to a
sexy blond vampire.
Blue eyes looking up at him while his shiney pink cock slides down his throat.
And that was the image that sent him over the edge.
Missing the bowl completly he shot onto the wall behind.
It took a good 5 minutes more for things to deflate enough for Xander to
take the much needed piss and tuck himself back away.
'Well that was odd.' He thought.
Funny what beer can make you do.