Pairings: Spander, with mention of previous partners for Spike.
Appropriate Ratings: NC17
Warnings: non-con, violence, forced sex, forced boot worship, naughty naughty.
Disclaimers: Not my characters. I make no money off this, I'm just playing. I promise to give them a bath and thorough cleaning when I’m done! Joss Whedon is my lord and Master. All hail Joss Whedon.
Short Summary: Xander sees the fateful Magic Box video, and reacts rather badly.
Word Count: 4600 (As per MS Word Count)
Beta: tamakin, any errors are mine and mine alone.
X-posted to: perverted_pages, btvs_lightsout
darker_spike, btvs_slash, sxandviolence, dirty_fic
COMMENTS ARE MY CRACK!! Please feed me my crack! Pretty please? Pretty pretty please? I’ll give cookies!
He stepped out of the shop, a little bounce in his step. That was fun, got the blood pumping… I’m in the mood to kill some demons! Work off the rest of this – GAGH!, and suddenly dove to the side, looking shocked at the short handled axe that’s buried blade first into the wall where his head was a split second before. Bloody hell?
He stared dumbfounded as the shaggy haired brunette struggles to free his weapon, before he gave up, and grabs the offending vampire by the front of his shirt, throwing him hard onto the ground. Neither one of them notice the petite blond that runs over to their altercation, both of them rather intent on the other.
Xander reached down, and picked up the vampire once more, slamming him into the wall before delivering a sharp punch to his solar plexus, and smirked as he hunched over from the blow. He may not need to breathe, but it still fucking hurts. Fucking VAMPIRE! he seethed inwardly.
“Get up. GET UP!” He hollered into his victims face. His rage not dwindling at the vampire’s lack of reaction. He’d never felt this furious before, he wasn’t even sure he was really doing this, things had reached a surreal state. He could feel the anger boiling off him in thick waves, but he didn’t care, he just wanted… wanted to hurt him, like he’d been hurt.
“You’re just gonna sit there? Do nothing?” He snarled to himself and picked Spike back up onto his feet. A split second of thought, STAND UP, like THAT, can’t you just do what’s RIGHT for once? before he slammed Spike’s head against the pillar as hard as he could. “That the kind of man you are?” He spat into Spike’s face. Platinum and chocolate facing off against each other.
Spike drawled with as much ‘well duh’ as he could mange, “I’m not going to fight you. Chip,” and gave him a look of contempt. He knows I can’t bloody well fight back, what the hell is the matter with him, what the hell set him off this time? which was all he could think of before Xander kneed him hard enough in the gut to make him double over again. That… wasn’t nice. Lucky I ain’t human, or I’da hurled all over his pretty shoes… then again if I was human, I’da beaten the crap outta him before it GOT this far. STUPID CHIP, stupid Sunnydale, and what the hell is the matter with him ANYWAYS?
“Too bad,” and before he could think, he’d pulled out the stake he kept in his pocket at all times, pulled his arm back, and just as he was about to plunge it towards the vampires heart, Anya barelled out of the shop.
“Xander, no! Stop it! Stop it!” She yells at her former fiancé, just as Buffy finally made it to the squabble, a running leap against Xander from behind and he was shoved to the side, saving Spike’s un-life as the stake completely missed its mark. Xander’s normally soft eyes shot daggers into the slayer. Anger, betrayal, confusion, a cacophony of emotions danced along his face, making his fingers shake, making it even more impossible to think clearly.
“Xander, I…” Anya started, before she was cut off.
“Don’t even try to deny it. ‘Cuz I saw it all. The whole beautiful show.” Tears? Was that tears he was feeling pricking at the corners of his eyes? Angry tears, he thought to himself. I’m allowed angry tears, but kept blinking them back, not letting them fall, trying hard not to let them show.
“How…?” She stopped, realizing it didn’t matter. “It was just… it was just a thing. I… I felt bad and… he was just… there.” It sounded lame, even to her own ears, but everything was still spinning, the scotch still running in her veins, the need, the want, that had so taken her over seemed barely tamed. She tried hard to clear her head, to think clearly. Obviously Xander had found out. Obviously he didn’t approve. Obviously… he was hurt.
Buffy glanced at Spike, and said flippantly, “Didn’t take long, did it?”
Spike replied with a silent withering look.
“Oh, okay! You had to do it. Because he was there. Like Mount Everest. Like I used to be.” His voice fell slightly at the end. He knew Anya had never really cared about him. That she just wanted to experience being human, that she never really wanted the Xan-Man… no one ever did.
Anya looked pissed. Really really pissed. “And then you weren’t. You left me, Xander. At the altar. I don’t owe you anything. Her anger started to burn off the alcohol, she was more sober, but not necessarily more in control.
“So you go out and bang the first body you can find? Dead or alive?” He leaned into her, bringing his face closer to hers, his eyes darkened by anger.
Anya’s jaw dropped before she spoke, “where do you get off judging me?”
“When this is your solution to our problems. I hurt you and you hit me back? Very mature.” Sarcasm. He could do sarcasm, he was good at sarcasm. Anything to keep from admitting to the hole in his heart, to keep him breathing, because he wasn’t sure he could anymore. It felt like someone had ripped out his insides, leaving him hollow and aching.
“No, the mature solution is for you to spend your whole life telling stupid, pointless jokes so that no one will notice that you are just a scared, insecure little boy!” That’ll hit the mark, she thought to herself.
“I'm not joking now.” He lifted a finger to point at her, “You let that evil, soulless thing touch you. You wanted me to feel something? Congratulations, it worked. I look at you and I feel sick... because you had sex with that.” He pulled back from her, face twisting into a disgusted snarl.
Spike carefully looked away from the verbally dueling couple, and spoke clearly into the echoing silence. “It's good enough for Buffy.”
Xander glared unseeingly at Spike, his attention focused intently on Anya, “Shut up and leave her out of...” suddenly it dawned on him what Spike had said. Silence seemed to ring in everyone’s ears as both he and Anya look over at Buffy.
“Buffy?” Anya looked incredulous.
“Xander...” Buffy started, trying to come up with some excuse, some reason, to wipe that look from his face.
Xander shook his head dumbly in denial, feeling the blood drain from his face, his fingers going numb, making him drop the stake. He heard it rattle onto the ground dimly, heard his voice struggle through his throat, “I don't want to know this. I don't want to know any of this,” and then he left, moving his legs, needing space between him and that scene, turning his back on everything that had just been revealed. Buffy shot Spike a pointed glare before running after her friend.
Spike swiped a hand across his mouth, fully straightening himself, before opening his mouth, hiding his fear, and embarrassment at getting his arse handed to him on a silver platter by the whelp. “Bloody Xander, mucking up everything. You know, I wish-”
Anya cut him off before he could get further, “Don't.” She couldn’t hear any more, she couldn’t bear it, she couldn’t imagine hurting him more then he already was. She felt guilty for causing that pain, for the first in her life, she’d hurt a man who had betrayed a woman, and she felt guilty about it. She didn’t think she liked it. As Spike looked at her in stunned silence, she grimaced in self-disgust, and headed off, hearing Spike head off in the opposite direction.
Spike stalked off, lost in his own mind, snarling about what he’d do if he got the chip out, creating a numbered priority list of things he wanted to do before he killed the Scooby that had humiliated him so. He was so lost in his own angry delusions, that he didn’t hear the footsteps, or register the two fists tangled in his shirt, lifting him off his feet and slamming him into a wall. His knees gave out from underneath him, and he couldn’t find himself to look up at his captors face.
“I’m not through with you,” Xander hissed out, breathing down Spike’s neck. He unceremoniously dragged the barely resisting Spike into an alley, “And until I am, you aren’t going anywhere.”
He went down to the middle of the alley, and threw Spike against the wall again.
This time Spike glared at him,stupid pillock, think he can push me around, think he can just ruin a perfectly good mood, bully me because I’m helpless. A helpless vampire, like a puppy! Not that I’m a puppy, I’m the Big Bad! Stupid git probably gets off on beating up vampires, probably why he stays with the damned Slayer. His anger grew more and more potent and when his back finally collided with the moist alley wall, he pulled himself back, arm drawn as far back as it could, fist clenched tight.
He aimed his punch to land square in the damned Scoobies face, chip be damned! When suddenly Xander kissed him hard, hard enough enough to bruise. Spike’s mouth dropped open in shock, brain feeling fried as it was force to switch from Fight or Flight, anger and violence, to… What the hell is this?, which Xander soon took advantage of. Warm tongue pressing against his, plundering his mouth with a dark hunger Spike had never thought the boy could possess. He felt the warm human body pressing against him, pinning him to the damp brick wall, the boys arousal clearly displayed, and harshly ground against his hip, Spike’s own erection quickly filling out in response.
Xander finally pulled back from him, his lips reddened and swollen from the kiss, he looked at Spike’s confused eyes before giving him a harsh knee to the balls. Spike huffed in a sudden breath, and fell to his knees grunting, trying to get his muscles to start responding to him again.
“You think you can just come here, be all snarky, stalk my best friend, fuck my girlfriend, ignore ME, and just get away with it? You think you’re above everything, don’t you? You think you don’t have to held accountable for your actions, that you don’t have to behave like a fucking NORMAL PERSON, do you?”
He kicked Spike again in the gut, when he made moves to get up. “Did I SAY you could get up?” His voice rose another octave, feeling so hurt, so empty, the rage started leaving him, and he could feel the tears start up again. He fought them off by kicking Spike as hard as he could in the ribs, hearing them crack, hearing spike let out a strangled cry of pain.
“You think you earned them? That you deserved them? You think you are worthy of Anya? Never mind worthy of Buffy!!?” He kicked Spike again, and again. “Do you think you are worthy?” KICK. “Do you?” KICK “Well?” KICK “are you WORTHY SPIKE?” KICK “WELL?”
Each blow drove bolts of pain through him. He felt each connection of the steel toed boot, and kept trying to get away, but he was cornered against the wall, and Xander kept following him whenever he slithered further down. He couldn’t stand up, the pain was making spots of colour explode in his eyes, he felt more ribs crack, and finally grunted out a response. It made Xander freeze.
Spike cleared his throat and tried again, “no, I’m not…” he could barely get the words out, his entire abdomen felt like one giant bruise. Pig’s blood may be filling, and somewhat nutritious to the vampire, but the strict diet he’d been following had impaired a lot of his speedy healing. He was going to feel this beating for days, and he couldn’t do a damned thing. Any swipe he made at the brat would just set the chip off and make this pain seem like nothing, leaving him vulnerable to further attack, and likely anger the kid into a more vicious attack then he was currently dealing. He couldn’t get away, he couldn’t move fast enough to block Xander’s blows, could barely tense his muscles to keep the kicks from doing even more severe damage. When the kicking stopped he curled up into a fetal ball, shaking at his repressed rage, and pain.
“That’s right, you’re not. You’re not even worthy enough to get our help, to get us to run your fucking errands, get you your blood, make sure it’s heated just right, and the goddamned Wheetabix!” He kicked Spike again at that, remembering the gruesome task he’d had to perform, several times, just to get the bleached blond menace to shut UP!
“I think it’s time you started to pay us back, for all your transgressions. I think it’s time right now. Lick my boot clean,” he said, spitefully pressing his filthy work boots against Spike’s chiseled cheek.
“Sod off Harris. I may not be worthy of them, but I ain’t going to bloody well lick your shoe!” He struggled to push himself up, and saw stars as Xander kicked his face, feeling himself fall prone to the ground.
Xander pressed one boot against his face, and the other between Spike’s shoulder blades, holding him down. “I said, lick my fucking boot clean, you little leach.”
Spike struggled to get up, but felt nothing but pain from his broken ribs, his bruised abdomen, he couldn’t fight free of Xander. He’d never felt so helpless, so hopeless. He remembered the frenzied coupling he’d had with Anya, her eager hot little hands and mouth. He remembered trying to loose himself in all of that, but all it did was bring out what he lacked. He wasn’t a man, never could be. He’d never be worthy of real love. Every one he’d ever loved had betrayed him… Buffy, Angelus, Cecily, his own mother, even his darling Dru. He wasn’t worthy of love.
He was allowed up enough to lick Xander’s boot, and he did, once, timidly, shaking with the effort. Xander pressed him down again, mashing his face against the top of the boot. Spike snarled, and struggled against the humiliating and heavy boot. His vampiric strength finally aided him, and he threw Xander off, but before he could struggle to his feet, he heard Xander sigh.
“Necto,” Xander mumbled, and threw a single knotted thread onto Spike. The thread disappeared, and Spike was suddenly immobile. “Like it fangless? I asked Willow to make it for me, in case you got out of hand. I think you have. I think you’ve been a rather bad neutered doggy. I think,” Xander reached over, and positioned Spike’s face on top of his boot, “that you’re going to lick my boot clean.”
Spike snarled and struggled, vamping out to add strength to his endeavor, but all he found himself doing was writhing and squirming a bit on the ground, as if he’d been bound with rope. Pain from his ribs caused him to halt, panting softly in distress. One more kick to his abdomen caused another eruption of of strangled noise from his mouth.
He looked up at Xander, hate in his eyes, and gently licked his boot, agile tongue curling about the leather, stroking the dust grime and dirt off. When he was gently prodded, he continued his labors, laving the boot with careful strokes. When he was done to Xander’s satisfaction, the other boot was proffered, and again cleaned.
“Good boy. You can be taught, maybe I won’t have to dust you after all. You really are a bad pet, you get fed, a roof over your head, and you still go out of your way to annoy, anger, and HURT all of us. You’re like a dog that just won’t stop nipping, and I’m here to train you back into obedience.” Single handedly, Xander picked Spike up, the spell making Spike almost weightless, and completely pose-able, as long as it was the wielders will, otherwise it would make the vampire completely immobile and firmly rooted.
Spike suddenly realized what kind of situation he was in, held weightless in Xander’s grasp. He was immobile, at the mercy of a Scooby who had never liked him, whose girlfriend he’d just fucked, unable to defend himself, protect himself, or run away. He already had broken bones, probably some kind of internal damage, and wasn’t at his healing peak. Things weren’t good for our white haired hero.
Xander positioned his menace on his knees, carefully crossing Spike’s wrists. Spike noted he could move about as if just his wrists were tied, his arms able to move almost freely about.
“Take me out,” Xander hissed, pressing one of Spike’s palms roughly against his crotch, letting the vampire feel the heat, the blood pulsing under his hand.
Spike snorted, “Not bloody likely mate,” and tried to lower his hands.
Xander’s voice was soft, but clear, and very very honest, “If you don’t, I’m going to just have to find some other way to pass the time.” He pulled out a vial of holy water, and a plain wooden cross with his free hand, looking down at the vampire.
Spike swallowed, and moved to obey. He racked his brain, looking for a way out and couldn’t find one. The only consolation he had was the thought that at least the whelp wouldn’t tell anyone about this… he didn’t think, he hoped. He’d never admit to having forced me. None of the bloody Scoobies would think he was a big man because of it.
Spike pulled Xander’s turgid cock out, his cool hands agile and careful as he removed the rest of him, balls and cock swinging free. Xander’s pants were left bunched up on his thighs, spread legs keeping them from sliding further down.
“Open up that quick mouth of yours Spike. Let’s see that tongue put to better use then annoying the fuck out of all of us.”
Spike opened his mouth, and stuck out his tongue, rasping the flat of it against the head. Xander’s breath hitch, then got caught in his throat again as Spike sucked the head into his mouth.
Cool velvet, Xander thought. Tight cool velvet, oh gawd, with suction.
“So good Spike, that’s right… take it all. Suck me off right, Spike… it’ll be better for you if you do. I promise it’ll be better if you are a good boy…”
Spike closed his eyes, and slowly slid Xander’s length down his throat. He snapped his eyes open when Xander hissed at him, pulling sharply at the gelled hair.
“Don’t look away. I want you to know who’s cock you’re sucking. I want you to remember my cock sliding down your throat, I want you to remember trying to please me, because it would get this over faster, and because I want you to…,” Xander ran his fingers through the platinum locks, freeing the curls from their gel prison, before fisting his hands, and slamming down Spike’s throat.
Spike didn’t gag. He’d learned better then that being under Angelus’s wing. He consciously relaxed his throat muscles, and accepted the intruder into the depths. He swallowed along the thick invaders length, hearing an appreciative moan from the boy. He couldn’t bite, the chip would fry his brain if he tried, so he did what he could. He used the training Angelus had beaten into him all those years ago, and plied it against the young mans stamina.
Vampire technique that accentuated the lack of need to breathe won out against Xander’s will, or maybe Xander just wanted it over with quickly, Spike never knew. He swallowed a few pulses of the human’s hot cum, and felt the rest spray on his face when Xander pulled out.
Xander drew his thumb through the biggest puddle, coating his thick digit, before forcing it into Spike’s mouth. “Suck it clean puppy, there’s a good boy.”
Xander sighed happily as Spike kept up his aural administrations. Spike’s soft cool tongue stroking up and down the length of Xander’s thumb, swirling about the tip, Xander shivered as Spike applied suction. He felt his cock restore itself to its previous insistent and rigid shape.
Xander was breathing heavily, and suddenly pulled Spike up to his feet. He tore off Spike’s leather duster, ignoring the indignant cries of his captive. He pulled a sharp blade from his jacket pocket. It was short but would do the job. He bent the vampire over at the waist, pressing his palms flat against the wall. Carefully Xander spread Spike’s legs, getting Spike’s arse to just the right height.
“Hold still puppy, or you might get hurt,” Xander murmured, kneeling between Spike’s spread legs. The dim light from the mouth of the alley glinted of the sharp metal blade. Xander smirked as Spike locked wide blue eyes with his.
“Bloody hell Harris, what the hell do you think you’re doing?” He was trembling, unsure what was going to happen. What the hell is the whelp doing? He flinched when Xander’s blade cut through the denim of his pants. He’s not cutting me… why isn’t he cutting me? What the hell is he…, and then he realized what was going on, feeling the cool night air caress his now naked arse.
“Harris… Xander… what are you doing? You don’t want to do this Harris, I know you don’t.”
“What the hell do you know? You’ve never paid attention to me, unless it’s to insult me. Never noticed me. I let you stay in my ROOM, and you just mouthed off, and whined, and complained, and nothing else. Never cared that I jerked off every night, so close to you, I could have just reached over and…” Xander straightened and pulled out a tiny tub of Vaseline, the kind sold at corner stores to use as chap-stick. “But I didn’t. I could have forced you then, but I didn’t, because I didn’t think you deserved that. No matter how much of an arrogant annoying murderous vampire you were, you didn’t deserve that.” He stabbed a Vaseline coated finger rudely into Spike’s arse hole. “Now I see how less then human you are.”
Spike held silent, not understanding the boys prattle, and pretty sure he wouldn’t no matter how hard he tried. Besides, the first finger now had a friend, stretching him as they scissored inside him, and they felt wonderful together. The familiar burn, and pressure built up slowly inside him. Buffy had done this with him, but she’d been less gentle then Xander was being. A third finger joined the first two, and Spike couldn’t help but grunt when they brushed over his prostate.
A wicked gleam bloomed in Xander’s eyes as he realized what he’d done. “You’re nothing Spike, any attraction I felt to you was just for your bod, and I’m going to use it, then walk away, because you aren’t worth anything more then that. You’re less then nothing…” he kept this monologue going through the whole process of stretching out Spike’s hole, and lubing himself up with the remainder of the Vaseline, but Spike wasn’t listening.
Spike was in heaven. He bit his lower lip to keep his needy cries in as Xander stroked his prostate with careful ease. He hadn’t had anyone pay attention to his pleasure spot in years, not since Angelus had left the building, so to speak. Oh it felt good. He felt his knees give way, but the invisible bonds kept him firmly in place. He stopped hearing Xander about the same time he started begging under his breath. His whispered moans and soft pleas tumbled past lips still sore from the brutal kiss followed by forceful blowjob.
Xander kept talking until his ears picked up a new sound, the soft pleading coming from Spike. He slowed his fingers, and even heard Spike cry out softly. “What do you want Spike?”
“Please please… oh please, don’t stop, please…”
“I haven’t stopped Spike… tell me what you want.” Xander slowed down even further, chuckling as Spike’s buttocks tightened on his fingers.
“Oh god… Xander… please, please Xander….” He gasped out, panting, whimpering…
“What doggy? What do you want? Beg, beg puppy, beg.”
“Please, OH GOD, Xander, please, FUCK ME!” he sobbed, needing to be filled so much it ached. He was begging the brat to fuck him up the arse, after he’s been thoroughly raped in the mouth… tears pricked his eyes, and fell silently. Why not? he thought to himself, Buffy used me for sex, so’d Anya, even Angelus and Dru, why can’t Xander join in on the “Let’s Fuck Spike For Our Personal Enjoyment” club…
Instantly he was filled. Xander was as impatient and needy as he was. Never even LOOKS at me, won’t ignore me now, won’t forget me now… Thoughts raced through his head as he plunged himself into the tight sleeve of Spike’s cock. Feeling it milking him as Spike’s muscles contracted and relaxed, Xander wondered if he’d last long, if he should even bother trying to draw it out. Suddenly Spike lifted his head, and started growling, driving Xander to quickly reach into the destroyed jeans, and grab Spike’s cock hard at the base, preventing his ejaculation. Spike snarled, feral gold eyes lighting up with anger.
“You didn’t ask puppy, you didn’t ask to cum, and it would just make a mess… I won’t keep a messy pet. Only clean ones for me.” He pressed his fingers hard into Spike’s hips, slamming full force into the waiting arse, and filling it with is second load of the night.
Finished with him, Xander did up his pants, and tossed Spike’s duster over his shoulders. That’ll get him decently home, though why he cared about that he couldn’t say… he kept up the mantra of “less then human” running in his head. He staggered away from the bound vampire, suddenly disgusted with what he’d done, with making Spike beg, with taking what he wanted to be a loving experience and turning it into rape, regardless that he’d begged for it in the end.
“It wasn’t supposed to be like this…” he whispered, disgusted, bile rising in his throat. “I didn’t want it like this, it was supposed to be like this! Why did it happen like this?” Suddenly he gagged, spewing up the nights lunch against the far wall of the alley. Heaving, he kept vomiting till only clear bile rose up.
“I didn’t want this… I wanted… I wanted something else. Oh god,” and he ran away, calling out a single command over his shoulder, “liberatio” and the bonds disappeared, with Xander’s footsteps disappearing in the distance right after.
Spike sank to the ground at the abrupt release. His knees hit the filthy pavement, he almost dashed his head against the brick wall, and if it wasn’t for his outstretched hands, he would have. He was shivering, curled up on his knees on the ground, holding his trench coat tightly about him. He wasn’t crying. He’d never admit to it. Those weren’t sobs wrenched from his chest as yet another person used him for sex. He was okay, it was okay.
Never mind that he’d always dreamed… that he’d always wished… he just wished it hadn’t been like this.