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|| Bloodclaim ||
You know they're doin' it
The More Things Change 2/? 
24th-Mar-2007 03:04 am
Spander
Author: slashtheboyz
Title: The More Things Change
Chapter: 2/?
Pairing: Spike/Xander
Rating: FRAO
Feedback: Comments and email
Concrit: by email please
Disclaimer: The characters belong to Joss and a bunch of lawyers. I'm just playing with them. No disrespect intended. No reflection on real persons or places intended. I'm not making any profit from this. This is strictly for entertainment.
Warnings/Squicks: A little strong language so far
Summary:Xander goes to LA on a fact finding mission and who does he run into but Angelus. Scariness ensues.
Previous chapters: Here
Notes: This doesn't strictly follow canon. Sooo if you don't like that sort of thing you might want to skip this. This is my first story so feedback is very welcome. Please send concrit by email.
Beta(s): The wonderful and gracious mwrgana Thank you and XOXOXOXO. All mistakes and looniness left are mine and mine alone.
Graphics: (size, and artist)


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He thought back to a week ago, back to the beginning of the whole sorry mess. maybe it would distract him from the hunger gnawing at guts, and the weakness he could feel trying to drag him back into blessed unawareness.



Hindsight is 20/20. He bitterly regretted making the trip to LA now, even though he had been the only one who could make the trip. It had seemed like a totally simple thing to do. Go to LA and ask Angel and crew about any information about The First they could give him to take back. Only, when he had gotten to the hotel, Wesley wasn't there, nor was Fred nor Cordelia. Angel was there, but it hadn't been Angel had it? Nooooo, he had to deliver himself right into Angelus's hands. And hadn't Angelus been delighted?

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It had been several weeks since Xander had pulled a crazy Spike out of the school basement and brought him home. He gave him the spare room in his apartment and made sure he fed regularly and bathed. Spike seemed to be recovering nicely except for nightmares and the few times when a blankness would wash over him and he would stare into space at nothing for several moments. He would snap out of his daze suddenly and shake his head and mumble to himself but continue on as though nothing had happened. Xander felt it was better to ignore the lapses and just keep observing since Spike had improved so much.


Spike was quieter than he used to be and the brash ego was toned down about five notches. The hard edge of his anger seemed to have been shed along the way during his adventures as well. Xander found himself liking this Spike despite himself.  He also had new found respect for the vampire. Spike had gone through excruciating trials to get his soul back unlike Angel whose soul was tacked on by a curse.


Xander sometimes wondered if it weren't more being cursed with a guilty conscience as opposed to a soul. A soul doesn't cause pain but a guilty conscience is extremely painful. Feelings of unrelenting guilt can be torture. A curse is supposed to be a bad thing anyway. How could anything good come of it? It wasn't meant to make Angel good. It was meant to make him suffer. It was revenge pure and simple. Because of what he'd seen in his short life he felt that souls didn't really matter much as a form of behavioral control. A conscience now, that can sway the mightiest of men, unless they lack one, like psychopaths and sociopaths, and they still had their souls.


Then everyone started getting the visitations from dead people. He had been really freaked when Jesse of all people had appeared to him. It had been particularly painful when the apparition had accused him of killing him and not caring. Then had tried to get him to kill himself. He'd felt like someone was carving his heart out with a dull knife.


There were Scooby meetings and discussions and it was finally decided that it was The First. The same evil that had nearly led Angel to self immolation in a Sunnydale cemetery at sunrise. Books were brought out and poured over and calls were made and they finally decided that they would send someone to LA to see if any additional information could be found there with Angel's contacts.


It was supposed to be a quick there-and-back trip.





Comments 
24th-Mar-2007 11:51 am (UTC)
I really hope you update regularly. You've already got me on the edge of my proverbial seat. Keep up the wow.
25th-Mar-2007 04:39 am (UTC)
*Hee* Glad you're wowed. Next chapter is up.
24th-Mar-2007 03:23 pm (UTC)
Really liked the way you talk about the curse, the way it's more akin to a guilty conscience. Poor Xander winding up in Angelus' hands, too awful to think about. I enjoyed the way he's thought things out, noticed the differences between Spike and Angel, how he's seen that Spike is better. Looking forward to seeing the next bit.
25th-Mar-2007 04:41 am (UTC)
Thank you.

I never believed that crap about souls controlling behavior. The script writers for both shows don't know much about souls. Sigh
24th-Mar-2007 04:05 pm (UTC)
I don't know why you don't want to give a summary, but I know that I'm not alone in not wanting to read a story without one, especially from an author with whom I'm unfamiliar. A summary is one of the main things that pull readers in. You might want to consider changing your stance on this. It will probably increase your readership dramatically.
25th-Mar-2007 04:42 am (UTC)
I just suck at summaries. LOL.

But okay. I made an attempt.
24th-Mar-2007 04:12 pm (UTC)
I like the description of Angel's soul as "tacked on" a nice way of describing the impermanence of it. It also makes it seem like Spike's is permanent...
25th-Mar-2007 04:44 am (UTC)
Thank you. Mission accomplished.

Well, that's the way it was/is. Angel is forever losing his soul. Spike never lost his once.
(Deleted comment)
25th-Mar-2007 04:45 am (UTC)
Thank you.

Hope to keep you that way. Next chapter is up.
24th-Mar-2008 12:19 am (UTC)
A curse is supposed to be a bad thing anyway. How could anything good come of it? It wasn't meant to make Angel good. It was meant to make him suffer. It was revenge pure and simple.

Exactly.
11th-Mar-2009 11:52 pm (UTC)
Oh lordy! This is sooo late... And I'm sorry.. I go back every so often to check for new comments because LJ hates me and doesn't send me notices that comments have been left.

Thank you, yes. I've done a lot of pondering over the curse deal, and how everyone around Angel seems to end up dead but not him. I've often thought that was part of the curse to keep him suffering.
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