Title: The More Things Change
Feedback: Comments and email
Concrit: by email please
Disclaimer: The characters belong to Joss and a bunch of lawyers. I only wish they belonged to me cause I'd make em do naughty things together forever. I'm just playing with them. No disrespect intended. No reflection on real persons or places intended. I'm not making any profit from this. This is strictly for entertainment.
Warnings/Squicks: None this chapter
Summary: Xander goes to LA on a fact finding trip and finds Angelus instead. Scariness happens.
Previous chapters: In my memories. I can't seem to get the link insert thing to work right. So just click on my user name and go to my memories. All the chapters are there together.
Notes: Serious post sex talking. This doesn't strictly follow canon. Sooo if you don't like that sort of thing you might want to skip this. This is my first story so feedback is very welcome. Please send concrit by email.
Graphics (size, and artist) Icon by moscow_watcher
*Like I'm a soddin cat or summat* He mused as a low rumbling purr started in his chest.
Xander's hands started at the back of his head, fingers spearing through his hair and scratching his scalp briefly. *Feels good.* Spike pushed his head into the caress trying to get more of of it.
The hands traveled down to his neck to gently massage there; The hands continued, rubbing slowly down his down his back, just feeling, touching. They stopped their journey at his ass; rubbing circles on his buttocks and then returned the same way they came and repeated the whole process.
"M'not a soddin cat, Xander." He complained, even as he stretched and pushed himself up into the boy's touch, purring.
Xander giggled and started his own rumbling purr. Spike's head jiggled on the boy's shoulder with the movement. He could hear the purr through the boy's flesh; He felt the vibrations against his face. "Nope, not a cat. Vampire. The demon loves to be touched. Hard, soft, tender, violent, pain, pleasure. It doesn't seem to matter does it? It just loves to touch and be touched. And I've always been touchy feely."
Xander moved under him sinuously; pressing up against him from collar bones to groin. "Love the feel of you. All soft skin and hard muscle."
Spike raised his head looking hard at the boy. "Okay, where's the real Xander Harris and when is he going to make a reappearance?"
Xander's amusement and contented purr melted away; His hands stopped their petting. They came to rest on Spike's back and settled there; touching. He looked down and met Spike's questioning look briefly; With a deep sigh he turned his eyes to the ceiling. "I really wanted a little quality quiet time with you before we got into what happened in LA. Can we get clean before we get into the gory details?
Spike slid off to the side rubbing his body against Xander like a cat. He grinned smugly as he watched the boy's eyes flare hot. The musky scents of sex lingering in the room were joined by a fresh wave of arousal. The boy's nipples crinkled and peaked into hard little nubs and he shivered. "We're never going to get out of this bed if you keep that up."
Spike rolled off the bed and held out a hand to Xander. The boy sat up and raked his fingers through his tangled hair. He scooted to the edge of the bed. He sat for just a moment and ogled Spike from head to toe. He accepted the proffered hand; Spike pulled him to his feet and flush up against his body.
Xander twisted his naked body against Spike. He reveled in the tingles that ran across his newly sensitive skin straight to his groin from every place they touched.
Hunger suddenly made itself known; knotting and twisting in his belly. He dropped his nose into Spike's neck snuffling furiously; He licked at the silky skin and suckled at it. He whined "I'm hungry, Sire."
Spike turned from sex machine to caring Sire in one instant. He hugged Xander close soothing him with gentle hands. "Right then. You're so different from other fledges, I forget you're less than a week old. Let's get clean first. Then we'll see about getting you fed."
Spike slammed the phone down with a growl. He had sent Xander off to shower by himself, or they would never get anything done except each other. He'd listened for the shower to come on then picked up the phone and punched in the number to Willie's bar.
Someone picked up on the other end.
"Yeah. Who is it? The whining voice sounded tinny over the phone."
"Oh hell, I knew I should have changed my number. What is the matter with you people? You're into harassing innocent people on the phone now?" Willie's whine became more pronounced.
"Stop your sniveling you tosser." Spike growled impatiently. "I'm calling to place an order. I need ohhh say a hundred fifty bags o' fresh red. I want it delivered to Xander Harris' apartment, in less than an hour."
"One hundred and fifty, less than an hour?" Willie screached in surprised disbelief.
Spike cursed and flung the hand holding the phone away from him to arm's length. Tinny, high pitched squealing and garbling came from the handset. He glared at the handset. When the there was a pause in the noise; folding his arm at the elbow, he cautiously put the phone back to his ear. He growled into the receiver. "Stop your nattering, you pillock. Just get thirty of em over here now, an' send the rest round every other day or so. They had better better be fresh Willie. I don't give a rat's ass about your supply problems. You run a business. I order and I pay. You deliver. That's seems simple enough even for you. No, I have no idea about the logistics. No, the Slayer is busy with other things at the mo. Where you get it is your business as long as it's a willing donor."
Spike rolled his eyes. "Of course it's gonna cost more for that big of a rush order." Sarcastically, then with a growl. "The good stuff Willy. I'm not laying out dosh for cull sources. No winos, addicts, cancer patients, expired hospital or blood bank cast offs or what not. I'll be able to tell if it is. Yeah, yeah, Call 1-800 who gives a shit."
Spike flung himself on the couch and glared at the ceiling. He snarled, game face emerging. "It's none o' your business why I need all o' that. M' Sire may be paying a visit, is all. Yeah, so what? I'm good for it, have a good credit card number right here. What? Yeah, add my tab onto the bill ya little weasel. Business? Don't give me that shite. Town's gettin' dead as a door knob. Yeah, alright. It's on the way? Good. Here's your number ya git."
Spike held up the credit card he'd snared from Xander's wallet and read off the numbers and waited. "Are ya deaf or what? Of course it's a good card. Told ya it was, didn't I? Bugger off, just deliver the stuff like I said. If ANY of it's not right Willie, I'm going to pay you a visit and you'll be wearing your intestines around your neck and coughing to take a dump."
Willie had been reluctant to deal with Spike because of the Slayer. But once Spike waved the Council's credit card under his nose and the charge had gone through with no problem, he'd caved quickly enough. One hundred n' fifty bags of fresh blood were being delivered to Xander's apartment. Thirty bags of the house red, still warm, would be delivered in less than an hour. All from back room on site donors who needed more money then the blood bank could pay.
Spike knew Willie would have to find more donors for the rest. It was fresher but it was also more expensive than hospital or blood bank leftovers, it still had the zing of life in it. But since the defunct council was paying, Spike couldn't find it in his unbeating heart to care too much about the expense.
Spike had a new fledge to care for. And Xander wasn't going to feed on that pig shite the watcher had forced on him. He was always half starved. His boy needed to feed well as a newly turned fledge; Between Sire's blood and the stuff from Willie's, Xander would stay healthy. He would gain strength and develop normally. They would both be at their peak physically; With The First slinking around both of them would need to be in top shape. And there'd be a little on hand, just in case, for emergencies.
Xander wandered into the room naked and still damp, wet tendrils of hair hanging in his eyes. He walked with a graceful loose hipped stroll that made Spike's cock stand up and cheer. He folded himself onto Spike's lap; nudging his head up under Spike's chin. He rested there with a sigh while Spike's arms went around his waist and enfolded him, drew him closer. The boy smelled of clean skin, something sweet, sandalwood and sunshine; the underlying rich, earthy scent of the Aurelian line, familiar and comforting. Family. Belonging. Spike started a deep rumbling purr and snuffled in Xander's damp, sweet smelling hair.
Spike announced; "I've got blood being delivered from Willie's. It'll be here in...," he stretched to look at the time on the DVD player ",shortly. Let me go take a quick shower and I'll be finished before it gets here. I don't want anyone to see you. I want you to go in the bedroom and close the door while I get the delivery. Understood?"
Xander nodded sleepily and slipped from Spike's interested lap with a smirk and a hooded gaze. Spike stood cock pointing, and smacked his adopted fledge on the thigh. "Smartass."
Xander complained ",Wha..I didn't say anything, Siiire."
Spike threw a ",no, ya were thinkin' it loud 'nough," over his shoulder as he sauntered toward the bathroom. He felt Xander's eyes on him like a physical touch until he was out of sight. He stepped into the shower hoping there was enough hot water. He hated cold water. He quickly soaped his hair and his body and rinsed under the spray. He reached out and snagged a towel; ran it over his hair then down his body.
When he came out of the bathroom he was surprised to find Xander there holding a shirt. " Sire." in a deep growling voice. Spike stepped forward and Xander carefully fitted the T over his head and lifted Spike's arms to fit them through the armholes one at at time. He pulled the T straight and smoothed out the wrinkles. Then he turned and picked up a clean pair of black jeans. Spike sat on the bed and Xander worked the pants up over his feet, and Spike stood up. Xander knelt and pulled the jeans up, tucked the shirt into them smoothly.
Xander leaned forward and buried his nose in the open fly of Spike's jeans. He nuzzled into the lush thatch of hair that surrounded the base Spike's cock; He breathed in luxuriating in the scent of his Sire where it was strongest. Spike's fingers threaded gently through his hair again and again, and settled massaging and scratching at his scalp. He started a rumbling contented purr.
Spike closed his fist in Xander's silky mane and gently tugged. The boy pulled his nose from his crotch; looked up at him through his bangs. He looked like he'd been drugged. "Clothes now, Xander. Or we'll never get anything done."
Xander blinked and gracefully unfolded from the floor. He walked over to his dresser and and started looking for a shirt. He nearly cried. He remembered liking these shirts before. But they were just ooky now. "Sire?" He said in such a pitiful voice and raised sorrowful eyes to look at Spike.
Spike laughed, he couldn't help it. He had been watching Xander go through the drawers ever more desperate, and then realize that was all there was. The expression of horror and bewilderment on Xander's face as he examined the riot of clashing colors in the drawers was just hilarious. "I know, Xander. Terrible, isn't it? We'll get you something else soon, tonight or tomorrow. But they'll do for now, so just put em on."
"Do I really have to?" More pitiful, along with a pout.
Spike hardened himself against the Pout. "Yes, you have to."
Spike heard Xander muttering. Something about evil sires and going blind, and there ought to be a law, as his voice was muffled by the shirt he pulled over his head. Spike laughed again as he turned toward the living room.
When Xander entered the living room again, he looked like the old Xander with the clothes and all, but differences were glaring, to Spike at least. The boy held himself differently. He didn't stand slouched anymore. He had more self confidence, like he was comfortable with his body and his skin fit him properly. His head was up and his eyes were lit with intelligence and dark experiences. This wasn't the Slayer's doughnut boy. Not anymore.
There was a knock on the door. Spike moved toward the door. He motioned Xander back into the bedroom, and placed a finger against his lips. He waited until the boy was safely in the bedroom out of sight and opened the door. The demon, who looked like a cousin to Clem, announced. "Special rush delivery from Willie, for Mr. Bradshaw?"
The demon produced a clip board and a pen. "Sign here, Please." Spike signed with a flourish and the demon handed over the large cooler. Spike took the cooler and slammed the door with a bare foot and leaned back against the door listening to make sure the demon left.
He carried the cooler to the kitchen; as he passed the bedroom doorway he called for Xander to come out. He threw the first twelve blood bags on the counter and opened the door of the refrigerator and stowed the rest in easy reach on the top shelf. No reason to hide the blood bags anymore. Xander arrived in the kitchen and helped him stock the refrigerator. There weren't many bags left in the cooler. He moved away to the counter and snipped open a couple of blood bags and emptied them into two large mugs. "Xander, come and feed."
The boy was there so fast he didn't see him move. His game face appeared and he took the cup Spike handed him and gulped it down in three big swallows. "More, please?" He asked. Xander abandoned the cup in the sink. He ws too hungry for that stupid cup. He found a large bowl in a cabinet and handed it to his Sire and looked at the yummy blood. "Please?"
The bowl held four bags of blood and Xander tipped it up and chugged it like the starving fledge he was. He gulped it down so fast Spike was not even finished with his second mug. He held the bowl out again. Spike didn't say a word just snipped four more bags and poured them into the bowl. By the time Xander reached the bottom of the second bowl he was nearly full and he lowered the bowl to see Spike standing there with the last bag in his hands. "Do you want this one too, Xander?'
Xander nodded eagerly and started to hold out his bowl again, but he stopped and drew back. "Did you get enough, Spike?"
Spike smiled a real smile at Xander. A hungry fledge showing concern for his needs? Would wonders never cease? "I got plenty Xander. 'Sides I'm not a new turned fledge. You might not have the crazy blood lust, but you'll need a lot of blood at first no matter how different you are. You've been starving yourself. No more o' that though. I'm taking care of it. It will help your control if you're not hungry alla time. Rupert is likely to try an' feed ya pig's blood, and bloody little of it at that. I KNOW how much blood a fledge needs. And you'll get it from me. If I'm to be your Sire it's my right and my responsibility to see to your food and well being all the way around."
Xander, thrust out his bowl eagerly at that. "Thank you, Spike." Spike dumped the last bag into the bowl and watched the boy drink it down much slower than the previous. When the bowl was empty Xander set it in the sink; ran water in it and added a little dish soap. He picked up both mugs and set them in the bowl also.
"That's the biggest bowl I've got. I won't like having to scrub it out before I can use it again, when I'm really hungry," he replied to Spike's raised brow.
Spike took him by the arm and drew him into the living room. "Alright let's sit down and talk. I think you need to tell me exactly what the bloody hell went on LA."
Xander heaved a sigh and took a big unnecessary breath. "You know the girls sent me to LA to see if I could get more intel about The First from the gang up there, right?"
Spike nodded once but didn't say anything.
"Before I even got to LA I could see a darkness hanging over the city, but I kept going.".... Xander told the whole sorry tale. Spike watched the emotions crossing the boy's face as he spoke. He wondered why the boy hadn't been in a lot worse shaped than he was when Spike found him.
Spike was silent for a bit after Xander let the last word leave his mouth. Just thinking. Organizing his thoughts. Xander was definitely a different kind of fledge that was for sure. The Scoobies were gonna have kittens and puppies over this little turn of events; that was sure too.
"I have a DVD, Spike." Spike looked up quickly at the tone and froze; he felt a thrill like ice water run through his veins. The boy's eyes had the cold dead stare of a shark. Spike had no doubt he was in the presence of a predator. A Stone cold killer. "Would you like to see it?"
Spike nodded dumbly. Xander stood to his feet and prowled across the floor and picked up his duster. He brought it back and sat down on the couch and dug in one of the pockets. He pulled out a DVD and a sandwich baggy came out with it. Spike grabbed the baggy and held it up. And let out an exclamation of surprise. "You haven't told me everythin', have you love? Whose fangs are these then?"
"They belonged to Angelus." in that awful controlled voice. "Now they belong to me. I consider them a well earned trophy along with the duster. We know about dusters don't we Spike. The trophy to the survivor?"
Spike raised his eyebrow and held out his hand. "Let's see the DVD then, love." Xander handed it to Spike and he bounced off the couch and put it in the DVD player. Grabbing the remote he went back to the couch and sat down beside Xander thigh to thigh. He turned on the TV and hit play. He began to watch Xander's revenge. He listened to everything the boy said to Angelus. He watched everything the boy did to Angelus. When it was over he sat there stunned.
This fledge had taken out Angelus. A newly risen fledge with the human smell still on him and the dirt of the grave still under his nails. This newly risen fledge had planned and executed the most brilliant revenge plot he'd ever had the pleasure of watching. He had rejected Angelus as his Sire. Had tortured and literally defanged him as an irrefutable message of rejection. To a vampire, being defanged was the ultimate in humiliation.
Spike picked up the sandwich baggy again and let the two fangs fall onto his palm. He examined them closely. He'd have these made into an earring for his Childe; Maybe coated with gold or platinum and set with a ruby on a stainless steel hoop. They'd look a treat dangling from nipple rings. He'd think on it.
"So you rejected Angelus, but you want me as your Sire?" Spike needed to be very clear about this. There wasn't room for any mistakes or misunderstandings. His demon was fighting for control. It wanted to pounce on this fledge and claim him, keep him. The fledge would make a terrifying Master, if he were trained up right. He had lured Spike into fucking him. He had knelt at Spike's feet willingly. And he chose Spike to be his Sire.
"I do. I need a Sire. I need you. You're worthy. You're an amazing creature Spike."
Spike's eyes widened at that. "How do you figure that?"
Xander pushed closer with his leg. He picked at the seam of his pants and pulled at loose threads on his shirt. "You've taken everything fate has thrown your way and you've overcome it, not just survived it, but adapted and used it to your advantage and overcome it, Spike. You're very strong. Stronger than Angelus. Stronger than Angel. Strong enough for me.
I'm just a fledge. I'm different, but I still have a lot of the instincts of a fledge. If I try to deny them or suppress them, all I'll do is fuck myself over in the long run. And I just can't bear the thought of anyone else."
Xander paused before he continued. The life and warmth had returned to the boy's eyes. Mostly. but Spike could still see the killer lurking, ready to come out again.
"When I died. I saw everything very clearly Spike. I guess there's nothing like a spot of torture and death to clarify things in your life. I saw why I lived my life the way I did. I hid from myself Spike. I lied to myself. I lied to others by hiding myself. I allowed people to treat me badly to keep their affection and make them happy. I allowed a piece of shit tell me how to see myself, and then I let my friends complete the job. I let other people's perceptions of me, mold me, and shape me. Lead me to my death."
I'm tired of lies. I'm tired of deception. I'm tired of people putting me in a box they've made, and telling me I have to fit in that box to be their friend; They know better than me how I have to live my life. That I'm stupid and I'm incapable of making decisions about my life without their approval, or magical rape. That I'm inept and that I can't be more or better. That I can't change because I have to fit in their box and stay there or they won't love me. But they can do; what they want to, when they want to, where they want to. and it's none of my business. They can ignore me as long as they wish and I'm supposed to come to heel when they deign to notice me."
"I am what I am now, through no fault of my own. I am different from the person that left for LA, a week or so ago, and if my friends can't accept the new me, then it's time to move on. I'm not goinf to go back into the box. Not for anyone. The hyena, the soldier and my demon are merged with my human soul Spike. There is no other being on this planet like me. But you understand me best because of your experiences. I've been so lonely. So terrified. I don't know what I can do. Where to go. I'm lost and I NEED an anchor. A Sire. You're the Sire I've chosen. If you'll have me?"
Spike listened and silently agreed as the boy talked. He had seen it long ago. But the boy had been blind to it, or wouldn't admit it. "Magical rape?"
"I don't know for certain. I can't really be sure until I ask about it. But I don't think that just the spell Giles did for me, to anchor my soul, would have the effect that it did, just by itself. Willow may have done something. What would you call magic used on you, that effects the development of the fundamental part of your being, without your consent, Spike? I call it rape, and even If it was Willow, it was wrong."
Spike reached out and cupped Xander's chin rubbing a thumb over that soft lower lip. "I've never heard of a fledge as young as you doing anything like you've done. Yes, I'll have you. And damned happy to. You feel better about it all, now you've got it off your chest?"
Xander ducked his head. "I'm sorry I didn't mean to dump all that on you, Spike."
Spike's finger under his chin raised Xander's head again. Spike looked him in the eye. "Never, ever, lie to me." He said seriously. "You always tell me the truth, no matter what it is. You tell me the truth, and let me worry about it. I'm not like your little human friends, wanting to be blind about things. If something isn't right, I can't fix it, if I don't know wot's wrong."
Xander crept closer and Spike drew him onto his lap; tucked the boy's head under his chin. He wasn't surprised when the fledge was overtaken by a storm of tears. He petted the boy while he cried out the stress of the past week or so.
Childer were notoriously volatile when they were newly risen and for some time after. Xander was running true to form there, despite all the merger stuff. Murderous rage one minute to tears the next. He'd also been intolerably stressed by hunger and the lack of a bond with his sire.
New childer were closely guarded by their sires. By his estimate Xander must have risen less than twelve hours after his turning. Which was amazing in itself, and an extremely rare event. The demon must have felt completely abandoned and too vulnerable to take the normal two or three days to settle into the boy's body.
He didn't know what effect the merger of the souls/spirits/personalities would have on Xander's development. He knew the boy had made it plain that he already had Spike on his mind when he woke from his mortal death. Spike's own demon surged toward the boy, wanting. Spike's soul wanted the boy too.
After Xander pulled him from the school basement and took care of him, his soul practically worshipped the boy. His demon had wanted the boy since Angel gave him to Spike as a gift on that fateful night years ago. Maybe that is why Xander's demon was able to reject Angelus so thoroughly. Prior legal claim.
The Slayer whom he supposedly loved had left him there in the dark dirty place for The First to play with. His demon would just as soon see her dead. His soul wasn't impressed with the Slayer either. Spike grinned. Wouldn't that get her knickers in a bunch.
Xander fell silent. Spike rocked him back and forth like a small child and rubbed his back. "I need to get a book and look a few things up about Sires and Siring. Angelus was always into that sort of thing. But I've got an old book of Dru's that she carried around. It has a fair amount about it."
"She was fascinated by the process, how the demon took over the body, how some childer were stable. How some were nothing but ravening beasts and stayed that way, then had to be destroyed by their sires. I'm the result of one of her experiments. It's why Angelus was always so harsh with me. I was more human than any of them. It's Ironic after he got his soul he didn't think I was human enough. Damned if I do and damned if I don't with either Angel or Angelus."
Xander rested against him and just listened to him talk. he kept rocking the boy. Finally he felt the boy's lips on his neck suckling at the skin there, when he felt the prickling of fangs he said. "Yes, feed from me Childe."
He shuddered as he heard the boy's moan and felt those razor sharp fangs slide into his neck. Xander began to feed from him. It's an intimate thing between vampires, the feeding. It only happened between Sire and Childe. And Mates. There is biting during sex between vampires but it wasn't the same thing at all. He felt Xander draw for a short time that curled his toes and made his cock hard then the boy fell asleep. Spike picked him up and took him back to the bed, stripped him and covered him with the blankets.
Then he went to the windowless, sun proof, vampire room Xander had given him, when he was a crazy, soul having, vampire. He opened up his old trunk; thing had been round the world several times, and scrounged around in it until he found the book that he wanted. He shut the trunk and went back to Xander. He stripped and slipped into the bed beside the boy, put a pillow behind his back, opened the book and began to read.