rngrdead (rngrdead) wrote in bloodclaim,
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Stilled Desire # 9

Stilled Desire
Author: josie_h@yahoo.com
Archived at:
http://www.livejournal.com/tools/memories.bml?user=rngrdead
Pairing: Xander/Spike
Rating: Mature Audiences – for content and themes
Summary: Anya utters a final garbled set of words that sets off a wish that will alter Xander’s existence forever…
Spoilers: Canon is Post S7 BtVS and S5 AtS.
Warnings: M/M – if you don’t like boys together, don’t play here! *Toys* and angst too… and lovin’ eventually
Disclaimer: Don’t own the characters nor make any money from stories etc, and bow down to their original creators Joss, et al., plus all the wonderful online writers who continue to give the Buffy/Angel verse characters life.


Part 9

The next few weeks went along rather easily, Willow returned home, and the Master and Consort gave in to several complete days of ‘togetherness’, now vibrators were off in favour of simple comfort, the longer periods of inanimate state lending themselves to honing in on what was… existence, the feel of the other, the smell of outside and the partner, the sounds around them, the changing colours in the room adjacent as the night finished and day began… Somehow, lying together, it gave a sense of … not frustration… peace. And as they took of each other on waking, the bond was simply strengthened, their soul already shared.

Five weeks into their new ‘regime’ Spike was needed interstate for almost a week. It was the first time they had ‘slept solo’ but it seemed for the best. Spike took his twenty four hours mid week before heading off to Chicago. Xander held him close – the soft arms and gentle kisses, the warm body and tender caresses reminding Spike just how special his Consort was, and also that he owed – well at least a reciprocal day. But they both knew that would need to wait. Xander would spend a day inanimate – but well bound – sometime in Spike’s absence of close on six days and when the Master returned they would enjoy a quiet day together.

The apartment was unbelievably empty without him and on the fourth night Xander decided. Unable to sleep he watched mindless advertainment and a rerun of Hogan’s Heroes – actually enjoying Schultz’s ‘I know *nothing*’ and remembering simpler times. But finally, he turned off all the lights except the light over their fish tank. Around four am, he thought of Spike, used all their favourite toys - even bringing himself to completion once - then waiting to ‘rise again’ before binding himself properly and invoking the spell.

He thought it was Spike returning home unexpectedly, but that made no sense he instinctively knew it was daytime. Besides, the noises were all wrong: the slight crunch of their door being breached; the snap of wire cutters and a crunch as their security system was compromised; and the stomp of feet that had none of the finesse or quiet grace of his vampire mate.

Unable to move, his only hope was that he tended to prefer lying completely under the covers (head included) when taking the change alone. And had a habit also, of piling the covers on top of himself, enjoying the weight, when Spike was not home. It had the advantage of making the bed look like a dishevelled heap of bedclothes and now, he hoped, concealed his existence.

He could hear the thieves ransacking the apartment, drawers and cupboards opened and closed, containers being tipped on the floor. Initially he worried that they were demon enemies of Spike’s but swiftly discounted that when he heard a beer being opened then a whoop for joy. They had apparently found Spike’s stash of JD in the hallway cupboard.

“Ho Yeah! Party on tonight!” then the sound of the bottle being cracked open and obviously shared.

“Ahhh F@#k on Carl, we’ll take ‘em at the end… just look for other stuff we can carry would ya. Now come on! Jewellery and cash… remember you dumb f#@#, we talked about this!”

“But the TV?”

“Oh yeah good move! And how the f#$% are we gonna walk out of this building with that f$#%ing huge thing hmmmm? Or are you thinkin’ of stashing it in Danman’s place. Get a f#@$ing clue! Police ‘ll check him first!”

Xander realised that these two knew the building’s maintenance man, but really didn’t think he was in on this… although… anyway, the voices were young, the rest of the conversation juvenile and the ensuing sounds of a scuffle sort of… predictable.

The ‘brains’ of the business ‘KG’ slammed the door of the bedroom open, and yelled to his fellow thief, “Now find some f#$%ing stuff and *let’s* go!”

Xander knew the instant they opened the closet and started rummaging, heard them scrabbling through drawers, felt random items tossed onto the bed and wondered if he were able would he have moved to stop them, the answer was probably yes, but a pointless decision. He was sex toy, voluntarily decked out in bondage, and locked in his sleeping position for another (by his estimate) at least another eighteen hours.

“Hey… hey! KG! Check this out! I found a watch and a bunch of rings – not that much but… oh hey! Two hundred bucks!”

Xander silently thanked the gods that he had left some emergency cash at the bottom of their shared ‘odds ‘n sods’ drawer as Spike liked to call it … and he would pray to any deity if only the vampire would walk in now… before they found…then he heard the drawer of the bedside table open and wished he could close his eyes and cringe at least a little.

“Sick F#@$ing Queer!! Check. This. Out.!!!”

“*Holy S#$%!!* What the…! C’mon *tip it out*.”

Minutes of giggling and guffawing ensued until finally KG yelled “F#$% *don’t do that* what if this dude has AIDS or somethin’.”

Xander heard the “Holy F@#$” response and a scrambling back mere seconds before his inanimate foot was exposed as ‘Carl’ knocked a pile covers and (courtesy of the thieves) other materials from the bed.

“Oh *F#%$*!!! It’s a dead body! KG!!! F#@$ing let’s *go* it’s a F#@%ing *dead dude*.”

There was an awful pause and Xander just knew. Then all the covers were thrown off.

And then “*F#%$ing Hell* This dude is one *sick* mother F#$%er!!!! KG… KG!!! Let’s just get the *F#$%* out of here !!”

Xander thought that maybe… just maybe, then his heart sank.

“Nahhh, I wanna leave a message for that rich sicko… C’mon…”

Xander remembered ‘Carl’ throwing up at least once in the ensuing half hour, but wondered why the boy was the one throwing up when it was he was the one who had been contorted and opened, entered by a human male (who was only rutting to ‘make a point’), and now had a full sized phallus vibrator on ‘high’ shoved into both his mouth and his rear end, nipple clamps biting into both his balls, and just about every device and restraint available inserted, binding, hanging or attached, all without care –the only intent to humiliate the owner of the “F#$%ing *man toy*.” And as a final touch, at least one of them spurted his ejaculate over the macabre figure before pocketing their loot and leaving.

Xander wished he could cry, but it would be another sixteen or seventeen hours for that. He wished Spike would come – but that would be two more days… He wished he could turn off the vibrations and remove the clamps… and stop the pain… stop the pain of the memory… stop the pain he knew he would cause Spike when he was found… stop the pain of the vibrator hitting his prostate again and again… and again.

Twenty four hours came. He coughed out the vibrating monstrosity, then threw up.

He eventually managed to roll over only marginally away from the smell and finally wriggled until he fell onto the bedclothes strewn on the floor the night before.

Arms buckled behind his back and attached to his ankles, his knees also bound, he had landed on his side, and in the process dislodged his glass eye. He cried… and eventually slept on and off, waking cold, desperately needing to urinate but finding that the bindings even cut off that, defecation also virtually impossible, and thirst fast becoming an issue. Six long hours later, found him saying his silent good byes to his beautiful partner and to Willow, and to anyone else who might care. Eight hours later he began panting and ten hours later gave in to unconsciousness.

And then Spike was there. At first he simply thought he had died as he was released and kissed and vampire blood was trickled down his throat, then he was in the shower and his bladder was pressed and he was able to *go*… and his rear was clear so when the nozzle did that… he felt all the poison and the tension go and the smell of them was gone… and then…

His next memories were of doctors checking things - his kidneys particularly but also the injuries to his nether regions and other ‘violations’, then of the police taking pictures of him and the apartment… and he heard them say they would come back to ask questions later because he was so ill…and all the while a very attentive, very worried Spike was there. And he worried for Spike… but then he felt the sting of a needle and his world turned blissfully black.

The doctors filed a report, as did Spike – for the theft and as a result, three days later, they found themselves giving a statement to the police, though the assault on Xander was still ‘undefined’, the evidence was damning. The aging detective who took the statement knew the signs. The man was sitting hand in hand with his obviously distressed same sex lover, and was being compelled to recall the terror of a home invasion followed by the ensuing tortuous hours before being found. Det. Mike Evanic asked matter-of-factly what was taken, then checked his description of the boys. But then “You were ‘violated’ in a number of ways… we know that son… and we’ve got the evidence of that. Did you know them? Friends of yours perhaps?”

Spike held back a growl and let Xander answer – soul or no soul the bastards would pay! “No!!! I didn’t know them… but I think they knew our building…

“Can you describe them?”

“They were I don’t know… white… late teens… Called themselves Carl… and KG… and … Oh I can’t Spike I just… I can’t.”

Despite the protest the detective knew he had to continue “After they tied you up with… ahhh… now don’t get me wrong… seen plenty of kink in my time – but consensual is one thing… what they did was straight wrong… But son we need to know… did either of them penetrate you in the course of their assault? Cause your friend here, ‘n don’t get me wrong Sir… but your friend cleaned you up before you went to hospital…” The older man looked directly at the blonde and spoke quietly “Now son… I know why you would do that and we can get around it… but we do need a statement from your partner here...”

The elderly detective saw the pained look from Xander, noted the tears now tracking down and tried to imagine what it would be like for a partner to hear the whispered ‘Yes, but I think they finished on me, not… in me’.

Xander then became so emotional that the interview was terminated less than a minute later. The sympathetic detective indicated to the couple that a full statement could be made later and *strongly* recommended counselling, adding that “I’m here when you boys feel ready, whenever you’re ready… OK?!”

They headed home in utter silence. What was there to say…

Inside the door of the now clean and tidy home, Spike pointed out the new locking system and security camera. He then pushed his partner to the bedroom, Xander almost panicking until he saw… while they had been away for the evening, the whole thing had been painted in a dark burgundy, the bed replaced and reorientated to a ‘north south’ position. Even the curtains and light fittings were new.

“Spike! But… *how*??”

“Minions Pet…’s what you have ‘em for …”

“Geez Spike this is …. Oh… This is just…” His tone dropped, as two tears also did “Just… Thanks… I’m so sorry… I [hic]… I…[hic]”

Spike simply lifted his beautiful consort onto the bed, kissed and massaged and loved him in the gentlest possible ways, and even though Xander was still upset… stroked him to completion before taking and giving more blood than they had ever done in the past. Spike then cleaned him and presented him with a whole new set of fittings.

“Threw the old ones out Pet… bad memories and all that.”

The pretty kid leather and natural colours were hardly a ‘Master Vampire’ thing, but the Sterling silver cock ring and associated fittings, all engraved with Master’s Consort, certainly were.

“No one gonna mess with us… Let’s just get some shut eye… together- like… C’mon luv, just relax....”

Xa nder was spooned and stilled for a while, enjoying the safety and the warmth of the blanket and the new black satin covers… but finally had to ask…

“How do we know they won’t come back? Even if I *am* able to…”

Spike simply whispered, “Don’t worry Pet, what goes around comes around… and more besides if you violate the Master’s Consort…”

Xander jerked awake suddenly, “What did you?”

“Me? Nothing Pet… just let the word out… and it seems that when a couple ‘o chaps are given a bit of vamp blood, whilst ‘bound’ and (as happens with the blood) coming as they’re taken, they remain begging for said same… and before you ask… The lads are still alive…Just now volunteered to spend a lot of time at Lady Gillian’s place doin’ ‘public servicing’ instead of robbin’ the innocent. Seems they feel quite compelled to spend their leisure time ‘helping out’ the lonelies of the demon world… Turns out that Carl fellow is *quite* the lap dancer!”

“But what about the police??”

“Don’t worry Luv. Demons in high places… besides… turns out Reggie from the pawn shop is quite good friends with our old detective downtown and a right bugger when it comes to thrall for a good reason… He’ll take care o’ that… I didn’t get a chance to tell him all of it, but since I rewarded him with a bit more than the usual tab for the return of our property and explained we’d sorted the other, he’s just cleared the records so to speak.

Xander tried to feel sorry for the two boys… but despite his shared soul just… couldn’t.

An hour or two later, Spike had him calm enough and they were bound and cuddling and the spell was being invoked, and in the painful seconds of it taking hold, they began to kiss, resulting in their tongues being intertwined and legs locked together for the next twenty four hours, and Xander really did feel… safe and complete again.
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