Kitty Alex (ex_kitty_al) wrote in bloodclaim,
Kitty Alex
ex_kitty_al
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If I Were Souled ~ The Pack

Title: If I Were Souled ~ The Pack
Rating: R
Author: kitty_alex
Feeback: Feed and I will give ot cookies!
Pairings: Spike/Xander
Disclaimer: I own nothing but the plot. I bend to Joss Whedon's will and try my best not to murder his characters.
Summary: Spike has gotten himself a soul by accident. The Powers That Be want him to go to Sunnydale and deliver a message about the upcoming Harvest. He just wants to get in and get out, but will he be able to stick to his plans?
Chapter Summary: Xander goes to the zoo and comes back possessed. Can Spike stop him or will he get lost in the madness?
Warnings: Souled!Spike and AU
Previous Chapter: Never Kill A Boy On The First Date
Notes: I'd like to thank kimalis for helping me out with Spike's slang. Then I'd like to thank Buffyworld for episode guides. Would also like to thank everyone who has left feed so far. You rock!




Spike was reading Macbeth on his bed when head Xander pad down the stairs. Spike ignored him and continued to read. Xander stood there waiting for Spike to look up. When he did, Xander gave him a small wave. Spike raised an eyebrow at him then went back reading.

“We’re going to the zoo tomorrow for school,” Xander said.

“Alright, want me to come along and burst into flames next to the elephants?”

“No, was just asking if you wanted me to bring you back something.”

Spike put down his book and looked at Xander, “What could I possibly want from the zoo?”

“I don’t know. They have great stuffed monkeys. Oh, I could also get you a smashed penny. Maybe you’d like a plastic rhino, or maybe a vampire bat watch.”

“Please, like I’d want any of that.”

“Fine! If you don’t want anything, I won’t get you anything.”

“I don’t want anything!”

Xander stormed up the stairs making sure he stomped loudly on each step. Spike rolled his eye and went back to reading.




The night after the zoo trip, Jesse was making whooshing noises with a stuffed vampire bat when Spike walked up to the table. He noticed Spike eye it and held it out for him. He looked at it like Jesse was offering him radioactive waste. He frowned and pushed it into Spike’s hands.

“Xander made me miss most of my field trip running all over the zoo looking for this for you. You are going to take it and put it on display and love it for all its fluffy worth.”

Spike sighed and sat down, “Fine. But, I’m not going to ‘love it for all its fluffy worth’.”

He sipped his beer and watched the people dance. Spike absent-mindedly stroked the bat. Xander and Spike seemed even closer than friends. The way Xander acted at the zoo about getting Spike a present seemed to indicate this. Jesse had been excited about getting Spike a present too, but he would have been content getting him a smashed penny of a zebra, but no. Xander had seen a kid walking with the stuffed bat and just HAD to get it for Spike. Xander split from Jesse and made him search all the gift shops from the north end of the zoo to the south end. Jesse finally found it; he hoped Xander would pay him back.

“Hey guys,” Buffy said joining them.

“Have you seen Xander?” Jesse asked her. “I haven’t seen him since the bat hunt.”

Willow shook her head and sat opposite Spike, blocking his view of the dancer.

“I haven’t seen him either,” she said. “Do you think he’s okay?”

“Look at Wills and her major crushage,” Buffy teased.

“I don’t know what you’re talking about,” Willow blushed.

Was it just him or did Jesse notice Spike glare at Willow? Jesse didn’t understand why Spike would glare at her. All they were doing was talking about Xander. Did something happen between them? Was that why he was so reluctant to take the bat?

“You just constantly monitor his health, his mood, his blood pressure…”

“One thirty over eighty,” Spike said off-handedly. He started when they all looked at him. “Yours is a bit high, slayer. You should relax more. Us vampires can easily tell blood pressure and all that.”

“It is?” Buffy said with a pout. “Would a diet help? I’ve been trying to diet.”

“It’s mostly stress, I think. Maybe you need a vacation or something.”

“Oh, a vacation from slaying. I knew you were my favorite vamp for a reason.”

“I wasn’t offering anything! I will not let you sit around while I get my arse beat.”

“What’s Spike offering?” Xander said teasingly while coming up to stand behind Buffy and Spike. “It sounds kind of sexy. Who will be beating your ass, Spike?”

Spike glared at him, “What? Looking to offer your services?”

“Maybe.” Xander picked up Buffy’s croissant and took a bite. He spit it out and blanched. “What is this crap?”

He put the part he chewed and the rest of the croissant back on her plate. She stiffened as if wondering if she was allowed to stake her own friend. Jesse had to admit, Xander wasn’t acting like himself.

“It was my buttery croissant,” Buffy said with a glare.

“This isn’t food! Birds live on this crap!”

“Xander, what’s wrong?” Jesse said with his voice full of concern.

“There’s nothing wrong. I’ve never felt better.” Xander looked at the bat Spike was stroking. “Look at the vampire and his little stuffed bat. Going to sleep with it tonight?”

Xander laughed and Spike glared at him. He stood up and ripped the head off the bat then threw it at him. Xander easily dodged the vampire bat’s head, but was hit with the body. That cost Jesse fifteen dollars! Xander was paying him back double! Jesse dropped to the floor and searched for the bat’s head.

“You can just have the damn thing back, mate. Don’t really give a shit what you bought me.”

“What I bought!” Jesse called from the floor.

“Mate?” Xander asked and cocked his head to the side.

He sniffed Spike and Spike stepped back, putting distance between him and Xander.

“Yeah, mate. You and me, we’re mates. You know this.”

Xander grinned, “Yeah, I seem to recall that.”

Jesse noticed Kyle, Tor, Heidi, and Rhonda come in. He never liked them. He was glad he missed them on the field trip. They were always getting in trouble. Jesse popped up and moved back to their table, trying to avoid the group. The group seemed to be coming towards them, but they stared Xander down and moved along. That was definitely not a Xander action. Jesse watched as the group circled around this one kid’s table. They sneered at him. Jesse noticed that Xander was engrossed with what was going on.

“You’re at our table,” Kyle said to the kid sitting at the table already.

“Yeah,” Rhonda said. “Shouldn’t you be hovering over a football stadium with ‘Goodyear’ written on you?”

They all laughed. Xander was laughing too. Spike laughed but his laugh quickly turned into a cough when he saw the look on Buffy’s face. Xander shrugged his shoulders.

“What? The kid’s fat.”




Spike came into the library. The school day had ended and the sun was going down. Giles thought he wasn’t going to show. When he had mentioned Xander was in trouble, he heard Spike hang up the phone with a click. Spike was there in a matter of minutes. He didn’t say a word, just sat at the table then went over the books that were laid out.

“Xander’s a primal,” Spike said after studying the books.

“You know about primals?” Giles asked.

“Spent sometime in Africa. Picked up a few things, ate a few villages, learned a few languages and customs. They were always going on about these things, never actually seen one.”

“So you know what happens if we don’t fix him.”

“Yeah, I’ll find him.” Spike said as he got up. “Just focus on finding a way to fix him.”

“Any suggestions?”

“Demon possession.”




Spike sniffed the air and turned the handle on the classroom door. This is where the scent stopped. The blinds were closed and the room was dark. Spike didn’t bother turning on the lights, he could see just fine. He inspected the cage. It had been ripped open. He felt around collecting the pig bones. He could probably sell them to some demon or witch who needed them for spell ingredients. He shoved the bones into his pocket and got up. He turned around to see Xander smiling at him.

“Xander,” Spike said cocking his head to the side.

Xander strode towards him, “Hey there, mate.”

Spike tried to move around him, but Xander stepped in front of him.

“Ain’t funny, mate. Know you’re possessed, but won’t stop me.”

Xander pushed him and still had that smile on his face. Spike growled and knocked Xander over onto the floor. He straddled his chest and pushed his elbow into Xander’s neck. He grinned at his successful overpowering of Xander.

“I’ve been waitin’ for you to jump my bones. Ever since I saw you in the library, just been waitin’ for you to jump me and drive it into me.”

Spike dropped his elbow so it was no longer in Xander’s throat, “This ain’t you, mate.”

Xander took advantage of Spike’s lax position to roll them so he was on top of Spike.

“Of course it’s me. You can smell it, I know you can. This is all me. “

“Get off me, Xander.”

“That’s not what you want. I can see it in your eyes. Every time you look at me, there’s this blood lust. You want me so badly.” Xander exposed his neck. “Come on, what are you afraid of? Your soul feeling guilty about biting a human? Not one now, am I? You can smell that I’m a demon. Do it. Bite me.”

Spike gulped, “I ain’t going to bite you! You’re not yourself. Xander would never ask me to bite him.”

“You’d be surprised what I want.”

Spike struggled, “You don’t know what it’s like to be bitten.”

“Then show me. Stop pretending you don’t want to. Stop pretending you don’t want me. You’re a beautiful demon mucked up by an ugly soul. Show me. Show me your demon.”

Spike morphed, “You want a bite? I’ll give you a bite.”

Spike sunk his fangs into Xander’s exposed neck. He drank from the boy’s neck. The sensation pricked him and it felt good. His soul was screaming at him that he shouldn’t have given in, but he ignored it. He drank until he felt Xander go unconscious and pulled out his fangs. His face shifted back to human and he ran a finger over the puncture marks on his neck. He hoped Xander could forgive him.




Buffy flailed her arms around, “YOU BIT HIM!”

Spike flinched, “I didn’t mean to.”

“So his neck just happened to fall on your fangs?”

“No, look, I didn’t kill him. He’s alive; the demon won’t let the host body die. He’ll recover quickly. It was either bite him or bruise him. And at least I can control my bite.”

“So are you saying you can’t control your punches? You’re not giving me a lot to go on.”

Willow sighed and looked at Xander’s unconscious body in the book cage. Her Xander wouldn’t ask to be bitten. Her Xander was sweet and innocent. He would never be attracted to anything dark. Not that Spike was dark, she amended herself. He was just a vampire that survived on blood. He was good to have around and was fun to talk to, but he wasn’t someone you dated.

“Slayer, if I’m making you so late for your meeting with the zookeeper, why don’t you just leave someone here with me?”

“I’ll do it!” Willow volunteered.

“Are you sure?” Jesse asked. “What if he breaks out and does what his pack did to Flutie?”

“I can do it. I promise I can. Spike will be here. He won’t let anything happen.”

“Thanks for the trust, Red.”

She smiled at him, “You’d do the same thing for me if I ever went bad and um, bit someone, right?”

Spike nodded, “Would protect you with my life.”

Giles took off his glasses and rubbed them, “Right, we should get going.”

Buffy handed the keys to Willow, “Be careful, okay?”

She nodded, “I will be!”

Buffy left with Giles and Jesse. She hopped onto the computer to start researching hyenas while Spike contented himself in a chair facing the book cage. He watched Xander’s unconscious body with a look of disgust on his face. Willow couldn’t tell if he was disgusted with himself for biting Xander or disgusted that he actually had to bit Xander. She sighed and typed away on the computer.

It wasn’t long before Spike was asleep in the chair. He was sprawled out with his head rolled back. It didn’t look comfortable, but she didn’t want to wake him. He always seemed so tired lately. She closed the clip of hyena’s eating and stared at Spike, he looked so human like that.

“Willow,” Xander said.

Willow turned her attention off the sleeping Spike and towards Xander.

“How are you feeling? You know, with the whole bite-y thing.”

He smiled at her, “Pretty good. I’ll have to ask him to bite me like that more often.” Willow made a noise and he laughed. “So what am I doin’ in here?”

“You’re resting. You’re sick. Spike said you…”

“Spike is the one that’s sick. Look at him. He looks so human laying there. It’s disgusting. Where is William the Bloody? Where is the man who used to rip apart entire villages with his bare hands? Someone needs to cure him, not me.”

“That’s not fair. He was human before he was turned.”

“Yeah. So? Does that make him human now? Can you really forget that behind that human mask is a demon waiting to come out?”

Willow got up and walked to the cage, “The human face isn’t a mask, it’s who he really is. This isn’t you. You really don’t want him like that.”

Xander laughed, “So naïve. My poor little Willow. The big scary vampire took her Xander away and now she’s trying to reason that my want for him is only because of my possession.” He went silent. “Maybe you’re right. Maybe I’m not that way. Willow, I’m still in here. Help me. I don’t want Spike. Please, Willow. Let me out and help me!”

“I am helping you.”

“You’re doing as you’re told. I bet Spike put you up to this.”

“No, Spike wants to help you. He feels so bad about biting you.”

“Spike feels bad about biting me? That’s a laugh! He’s a vampire. That’s what they do.”

“He’s not. He’s good. Just like you are. We’re going to fix this and make you, you again.”

“I am me.” He said softly. “Just come here and look.”

She moved slightly forward. Xander made a grab for her but she moved back. She glared at him.

“We’re going to fix you.”

“LET ME OUT!” Xander banged on the bars. “LET ME OUT!”

Willow went back to the computer, trying desperately to ignore Xander as he called out her name. She looked over at Spike who was oddly still despite all the noise Xander was making. She stiffened; there was something off about Spike’s slumber. She shut down the computer and heard glass breaking. She screamed as she looked and saw Xander’s pack coming out of the windows at the top of the library. She ran before they could come down to her.




Xander growled as Willow got away. He’d have to get her later. He turned his attention to his mate, sleeping in a suspended state, waiting for his order to wake up. He watched as his pack moved into the library and sniffed his mate. He growled and snapped as Heidi got a bit too friendly with him. That was his mate.

“Wake up, mate,” Xander called to him.

Spike’s eye snapped open and looked at him. They were a perfect mix of yellow and green, not even the slightest hint of human blue. Xander laughed at how easily the vampire had been tricked into biting him.

“Mate,” Spike said and got up.

The packed moved with Spike, following him and circling him. They waited for him to prove he was worthy of their pack leader’s mate. Spike felt the door that was holding his mate.

“Come on,” Xander urged him. “Free your mate.”

With a growl, Spike ripped the door off its hinges. Xander stepped out of the cage and Spike joined him at his side. The pack sniffed them both, making sure they were unhurt and healthy. He loved his pack. He licked his mate’s cheek and walked out of the library, everyone falling in step with him. He was going to show his mate’s demon a real good time.




Buffy could see them from where she was. They were standing around a minivan, Xander was off to the side snuggling a bleached blonde man. She was praying that it wasn’t Spike, but wanted to know how many people had a black, leather duster with bleached blonde hair. Well, it could be Billy Idol. She changed her prayers from not making it Spike to not making it Billy Idol when she approached.

She threw one of the girls out of the way; she wasn’t sure which, since she barely knew them. She hopped onto the minivan and glared at Xander and Spike. Spike had his head rested against Xander’s shoulder and was placidly licking his neck. Xander was stroking his hip and watching the carnage his pack was inflicting.

“Aw, puppy love.” Buffy said. “Isn’t that cute?”

Xander’s eyes snapped to her and he growled. Spike stopped licking and turned his attention to her too. His eyes were weird; Xander must have found a way to possess him too.

“You know what you want. Come and get it.”

Buffy jumped off the car and they ran after her. She hoped she could out run them. Spike was gaining on her pretty quickly.




That stupid bitch. Xander wanted to tear her throat out and rip her to shreds. His mate was doing beautifully though. She was inches out of his reach. She rounded the corner and into a building. His mate tackled her to the ground and they all jumped on her too. They were ready to rip her to pieces when Xander felt the presence leave his body. He felt weak and stood up. He looked around and saw Willow. That man was going to bite her!

“Willow!”

He moved forward to push the man back. Spike met him and helped push the bastard back into the hyena cage. Xander noticed a tiny smile play on Spike’s lip as he watched him get eaten. He had a great smile, but he shouldn’t be thinking about Spike’s smile. He should be helping Buffy and Jesse, then looking for Giles and not thinking about his mate. Xander made a strangled noise. He had to keep reminding himself that Spike was not his mate.




Spike was trying to read as Xander danced the newly sewn vampire bat around the flat. Xander had decided to stay home from school and not face anyone about what happened over the past couple of days. Spike finally snapped the book closed and stared at Xander exasperated.

“Would you mind telling me what you are doing down here when you are supposed to be faking sick.”

“I was giving Junior a tour.”

“Oh, that’s brilliant. You’ve named the damn thing Xander, have you?”

“No, I’ve named it Spike.”

“Even better. I am trying to read. Can you take that somewhere else?”

“Sure, mate.”

Spike froze, “What did you call me?”

“Uh, what? Oh, I’m feeling weak. I don’t remember a thing. Who am I? What is this place? I better go lay down before this gets serious.”

Spike opened his book again as Xander ran up the stairs. He had left ‘Junior’ behind and the pathetic thing was now lying limply on the floor. Spike put his book down and poked it the stuffed bat with his bare, big toe. When it continued to lie their pathetically, he picked up and put it on his dresser. He stared at it. Its blank eyes stared back. He glared at it, but its eyes didn’t change. He wanted to rip its head off again. But, instead he tried to ignore it. He opened his book and felt it staring at him still. He slammed his book down and picked the stupid stuffed toy up.

“What do you want?” He asked it.

He demanded an answer, but didn’t get one. Spike went into the bathroom. The toy floated in the mirror and Spike slammed it down onto the bathroom floor. Its pathetically blank eyes stared at him; he picked it up and positioned it on the cistern of the loo. It seemed a bit happier and Spike felt a little more insane, but at least it had a place to stay.
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