JenLea (bohofemm) wrote in bloodclaim,

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Fic: Keep This. I Don’t Need You. 1/1

TITLE : Keep This. I Don’t Need You.
AUTHOR: bohofemm
FANDOM: Buffy the Vampire Slayer
PAIRING: Spike/Xander. Past Spike/Angelus mentioned.
GENRE : Slash
PROMPT: 068. Mine.
WORD COUNT: 474 words.
SUMMARY: It takes a piece of a jewelry for Spike to realize what he doesn’t need and what he has.
WARNINGS: None. Dramedy.
NOTES: X-Posted to bloodclaim. To the Lovely
kitty_alex I give title and beta credit to. Set Post Chosen and NFA.
DISCLAIMER: You recognize them? I don’t own them.

“Babe?” Xander called, lifting the lid of the old mahogany jewelry box. Spike glanced up, from the book he was reading. “Can I ask a question?” Spike nodded, still reading. “What is this?” He held out a chain with a silver moon pendant. Spike reached out, taking it from Xander’s hand.

“That was a gift from Angelus. The only thing he ever gave me that didn’t come from something that used to be alive.” Spike shook his head, still gripping the necklace. “Then, he got his soul back.”

“You and Angelus were…?” Xander’s voice trailed off.

“Occasionally. When he wasn’t with Darla. Except it wasn’t all fluffy fun, like it is with you.” He moved the book off his lap, and pulled Xander close to him.

“We’re fluffy fun?” Xander raised an eyebrow. Spike nodded. “Hmm. I am truly surprised. Fluffy fun…”

“Well. You don’t tie me up, and bite me in places that shouldn’t be bitten.” he replied, lightly running his fingers through Xander‘s hair. “Drusilla was just as brutal.” He sighed. “So. Yes. Compared to them, we are fluffy fun.” He gripped the pendant. “I don’t even remember where he got it from.” He shook his head. “I actually loved him.”

“We have no control over who we fall in love with.” Xander murmured, lightly running his fingertips over Spike’s arm. “Look at us. The Evil Undead…”

“And the Slayer’s Pet. Madly in love.” Spike gripped him tighter. “Wonder if he remembers what we had.” He dropped the pendant back into the jewelry box. “Let’s forget it. I have you. That’s what matters.”

Angel struggled to read the hastily scrawled return address on the manila envelope. Opening it, he turned it, a silver chain with a moon pendant landing on his desk. Picking up the piece of jewelry, he seemed baffled, before pulling out the accompanying letter and examining it.
Do you remember giving me this back when we were us? I remember you clipping it on my neck, after we made love. It’s the only romantic gesture I can ever remember from you. I don’t remember where it came from. Xan found it in one of Dru’s old jewelry boxes.

You gave it to me a week before you gained your soul back. I wore it consistently for over a year, before I finally took it off. I almost threw it into the Danube but Drusilla was enamored by it. It was one of the few knick knacks of hers I managed to keep.

By giving it back to you, I am letting you go. I’ve carried you with me for over a hundred years. I have Xander now. I love him. In ways I could never love you. You tortured me “for the sake of love”. He doesn’t hurt me. Keep this. You deserve it back.

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