Summary: After his relationship with Anya fizzles out Xander and Spike become lovers. Xander’s insecurities lead him to seek help from
Notes: AU begins S6 replacing Hells Bells. No Dawn, Buffy didn’t die, and Season 6 Spuffy? Eewww no.
Feedback and con crit appreciated and lusted for
Disclaimer: not mine, all belongs to Joss and Co. Damn them. And bless them.
Other chapters are here
Beta thanks to kitty_alex
“Are you okay Xander?” she asked.
“Yeah, did something stupid, nothing new though. Just idiot Xander strikes again.”
“Okay Xander, first before we get started, I checked out something that just wasn’t sitting right with me.”
“You don’t have ominous face though, so is this good news?” he asked hopefully.
“Well its news of a kind. Whether it’s good or bad would be completely up to you to decide. Remember I said I could see a connection beginning in your aura?” Xander nodded. “Well earlier I realised the colours for the connection were not exactly what they should be for a normal relationship.”
“Hey, what is normal about this relationship?” Xander snorted.
“The colours showed some magical intervention.”
“So what does that mean? That the other spell was wrong? This thing between me and Spike really is only the spell?” Xander’s voice showed his agitation.
“Whatever is happening between you and Spike is really happening, its not being induced by magic in any way. But there are some magical aspects to it. What we think its doing is just accelerating what you and Spike had the potential for. Do you understand?”
Xander nodded. “Kind of explains why when we both wanted to take it slow, it sped up all on its own and kind of got away from us.”
“That’s right. There might well be more, but we need information from the next spell and maybe from those books
“Ooh, its like a jigsaw puzzle Xan,”
“Yeah, but Will I seem to remember jigsaw puzzles being much funner than this.” He pulled out a seat for her and waved her down into it, away from his ears. They were a bit sensitive today, maybe something left over from the concussion. “So are you doing this, or Tara?”
“Oh, no, this is
Xander breathed a sigh of relief. Much as he loved
“Alright, ready Xander? This works in much the same way, except that this time
“I don’t have to hold anything?” he asked.
“No, you yourself are the catalyst this time. Now, a light will come from your hands and form a symbol,
“And how to get rid of it?” he asked hopefully.
“We hope so.”
Xander stood up and eased his hands into the bowl. This time it was warm and the fluid reached past his wrists.
“So do you know anything?” he asked, wiping the potion off his hands.
“Not yet sweetie, but it won’t take long. We just need to look these up, find out what each one means then you’ll have your answers.”
“Okay, lets get to it then.” He sat down opposite her while she took the papers from
Too anxious to sit still and wait, Xander busied himself helping
“I’m pretty sure we have it Xander, sit down.”
“This is sitting down news?” Xander dropped into the chair, the awful and familiar heavy feeling of dread settling over him again.
“You’ve been through all of those?” Xander asked. “There’s so many.”
“We didn’t have to look at all of them, it’s a little like a dictionary,”
“So Xander we have something. It’s not everything you wanted to know, but it’s a start okay? Should give you some answers.”
Xander felt his heart pick up speed, it was sending little bursts of adrenaline through his body, making him feel light headed and a bit panicky. Oh God, Spike should be here by his side. Not
“I’m sorry, I can’t, not now. I need Spike here.”
“Right, I’ll try him. He might not have left yet.” Xander took out his cell and hit the speed dial for home. He paced around the kitchen while it rang, going to the machine again. “Spike? Come on, be there please. Are you still there?” Xander waited, knowing that he’d been too late. Spike had already left. Xander’s own fault. If he hadn’t lied to Spike then he might have still been there, sleeping, waiting. He shut the phone and leaned his forehead against the wall. He didn’t know if he could hear this now. He had no idea what
Xander thought. He had no idea where Spike would be, it was still a couple of hours till sundown so most likely he would be in the tunnels somewhere; it could take forever to find him. As much as he craved some kind of contact with or support from Spike, he didn’t think he would be able to wait so long for the information
“Yes, we’ll do that.” He turned his back on them and went to sit on the floor in front of Anya. She laid a hand on his shoulder. It bothered him just like
“Xander I’ll tell you everything I can. But just let me finish and we can discuss it all then okay?”
Xander nodded. “Just tell me.”
“Your spell is demon in origin. I can’t tell you which demon or when it was put on you. It’s been securely cast and kind of has a blocking element to it, so I’m not going to be able to take it off or alter it in any way, not without severe permanent damage to you.” She paused while Xander processed this before continuing. “Now I can tell you what it is. It’s a bonding spell. It’s used to bond another demon or a person to a particular species. Different kinds of demons use it, there’s no way to determine where it came from.”
Anya’s grip tightened on his shoulder and he reached up and held her hand.
“It was cast long ago and, for want of a better analogy, it’s like the demon equivalent of an engagement ring. So whichever demons have put this on you intended to reserve you for their species. The way a bond spell works is that it’s meant to be activated by a demon at a particular point in time. At that time you would begin to absorb the strengths of the demon so that you can function in their dimension.”
Xander’s eyes snapped open and he was about to speak.
“Okay, first. No way to take it off?”
“I think it’s only just been triggered. Now demons are sensing an unfinished bond and it’s quite appealing.”
“Just triggered? Wouldn’t I have noticed a demon activating me?”
“No. The spell is activated in a few different ways. The most common ways would be when the casting demon completes the bond with the second part of the spell. Or if the person who is bonded forms an attachment to the demon, or any demon actually.”
“Spike.” Xander said.
“Yeah, last week while I was away.” Xander let go of the girls and ran his hands through his hair. “So Spike activated it.”
“No, Spike has not done anything to you. It activated itself, it was triggered by your acceptance of your attraction to him. It could just as easily have been Anya. If she were still a demon when you were together, it would have activated then. ”
“So what does this mean? You said when it’s triggered that I would absorb the strengths of the demon. If I start showing some demon aspects then can’t we trace those back to the demons that did this to me?”
Xander’s face reflected his understanding. “I had nothing. Spike’s head wound is gone today too.”
“This part is the connection that came from the lighter, and the part that showed in your aura. You are taking on all the strengths and none of the weaknesses of a vampire.”
Xander frowned at her. “Thanks Will, like it wasn’t bad enough.”
“No, he won’t become a vampire, he’ll just take on the benefits, the things that make a vampire strong. He’ll still be completely human. He won’t even be as strong as a vampire really, close but not quite. It wouldn’t work in a slave bonding if the slaves were as strong as the masters.”
“All the strengths?” Xander asked. “I don’t even know that much, I mean they’re strong and fast, um what else?”
Anya took a breath behind him. “Better eyesight, better hearing, better sense of smell, better coordination, longevity, speed, sexual stamina. What could be wrong with that?”
“Plenty Ahn. I didn’t ask for any of it.” He looked to
“I don’t know Xander, I have no idea if or when they’ll come. The spell is so old they might have forgotten. But if they do you have all of us, Buffy and Spike on your side. And by then you’ll be, um, enhanced.”
Xander got to his feet and paced around the room, his hands fisted in his hair. Bonded. Some demon had reserved him. When? Where? How? All the questions
“You wouldn’t have even had to be present. It could have been done anywhere, anytime.”
That was no help. He had some answers, why the demons were after him for a start. And Spike was right, they had been. He was putting his friends in danger every time he went out with them.
“What’s wrong with it Anya? Well how about this? I can’t go anywhere with my friends. Demons want me, demons follow me, demons attack me. If I go patrolling with the gang it’ll just be like waving a flag or painting a big target on the Scoobies. How’s that for a benefit?”
He turned to
“As you take on more and more of Spike’s strengths, the unfinished bond will be less obvious to those demons, eventually very few of them will notice you, because it will be as though you’ve been fully bonded.”
He froze and shouted. “What? I’ll be bonded to Spike?”
“Not formally,” Anya said. “It will just look that way to other demons. At first glance they’ll think you’re a consort”
“A what? And what will second glance tell them?” Xander felt like his world was lurching along on unsteady tracks. He was being bombarded with so much new information, all of it completely rewriting what he’d thought to be his life up to this point and beyond it.
“A consort; its like the official partner of a vampire. And it’s unlikely there would be a second glance from any demon if they thought you were a consort. They wouldn’t risk bringing your master down on themselves. I have heard of the bonding spell but I don’t know anything more than
Xander sighed. “What about Buffy? What has this done to her?”
“Nothing, but Buffy feels the active spell when she gets within your aura radius. Her reaction is to protect you from demons. That’s why she’s so aggressive about Spike. But same as with the other demons, she’ll be less affected as time goes on.”
“I don’t know exactly Xander, I’m sorry. You’re relationship with Spike is a big factor. The closer you get the quicker it will be. And the spell is designed to make you closer faster but you need to understand isn’t changing your feelings, just fast tracking them. I can’t tell you how long.”
“I think the list of things we don’t know and can’t know is longer than the list of things we do.” Home. Xander just wanted to be home, waiting for Spike. Now. “
“That’s it Xander. I’m sorry it’s not more.”
Xander grabbed his coat off the chair. “Thankyou. Really, thankyou, but to have to go. I just need to be home.”
He started for the door, feeling an urgent need to be out of there, back in his apartment where Spike would go if he decided to come back.
“I need to
He opened the front door and started down the stairs.
“Xander take these with you. There might be something in them that helps.” She handed him the two vampire volumes she’d brought home earlier.
“Thanks Will.” He stood still and let her hug him, giving her a rather forced smile before hurrying across to his car.
He dropped the books onto the passenger seat, strapped himself in and drove off at top speed, praying that Spike would be there when he got home.