Series Title: Expectant Hell
Chapter Title: Twelve Weeks
Fandom: Buffy The Vampire Slayer
Disclaimer: I own nothing. I bend to Joss Whedon's will and try my best not to murder his characters.
Summary: A demon casts a spell on Xander. Willow reverses the spell, but weeks later, they find it has one huge side effect.
Warnings: Male Pregnancy and character death
Notes: Thanks to kimalis for betaing! Also, fic is under new management and it will just be me writing it from now on.
Previous Chapters: You can find previous chapters here.
It didn’t matter that Drusilla was in the next room, they feverishly tore at each others clothes, leaving them ripped and forgotten. The lube was squeezed and smeared; the hole was barely stretched as Xander’s thick cock replaced his fingers. He thrust at a hard brutal pace, filled with need and lust and Spike responded by forcing himself upwards with harsh feral grunts. The scent of blood that slicked Xander's way filled their senses, driving them faster, rougher. Xander’s frenzied pace faltered then stopped completely. He stared down into the face below him and his horrified gaze was met by an equally appalled expression looking back up at him. Xander jerked backwards, tearing himself from Spike’s body. Spike threw himself from the pull out bed and retreated at top speed to a far corner.
“YOUR COCK WAS UP MY ARSE!”
“MY COCK WAS UP YOUR ASS!”
“You fucking vampire. You mother fucking vampire, I can’t believe you did this to me.”
“Me? You’re the one raping my arse! Oh, bloody hell. I need a fucking smoke.”
“Raping? You were the one raping me. I have stated on several occasions that I would never ever fuck you. And you seemed to be enjoying it up until I stopped.”
“Yeah, well, I’ve probably just been desperate for sex and your pregnant arse happened to be the closest one at the time.”
“Pregnant? Holy shit, holy shit, holy shit, I’m knocked up with your demon babies, I’m knocked up with your demon babies. Holy shit. They did this. Holy fuck, they did this to us.”
“They did it?”
“Yes! Your demon babies made me love you.”
“They ain’t mine!”
“Well, they sure as hell aren’t mine!”
“What do we do now?”
“I think Anya would know about the spell. ANYA!”
He waited, but instead of Anya, a note appeared on the floor. Spike picked it up and looked it over. He laughed.
“I love the demon bint.”
“What’s it say?”
Spike raised his voice in a false falsetto, “Xander, stop calling me. I know pregnancy is a very trying time and I am doing the best I can to help, but you can’t call me at every little problem. We’re not dating anymore, I’ve been around for a thousand years, I know how these relationship things work. You’re on your own and if I lose my job, you’ll have warts in places that will make both you and Spike unhappy. Love always, Anya.”
“Isn’t that great. Now what? This is un-fucking-believable,” Xander put a hand to his stomach and groaned. “Can’t you behave? Why couldn’t I have gotten normal babies? No, I have to have psychic babies that make my stomach hurt and-”
Xander’s rant was interrupted by the ringing of the phone. He looked at Spike who was not making any motion to go pick it up. Xander grumbled and grabbed the phone off its cradle.
“Xander? Did it work? Do you know if it worked?”
Willow’s overly cheery voice came through the receiver making Xander cringe. He wasn’t in the mood for cheerful right now.
“Did what work? You’re not making any sense.”
“Oh, sorry. See, I cast a protection spell. Tara told me that you thought someone broke into your apartment so we’ve been working on one all week. We also took off any spells that might have been on any objects in your apartment, then we took off any spells on you just in case you touched anything before we could complete the spell. So, did it work?”
Xander cast a sideways glance at Spike, “Yeah, it worked. Thanks, Willow. It means a lot to me that you removed all unwanted spells for me.”
Spike snorted and grabbed a blanket, “I’m going back to my crypt. Good luck with Dru.”
“You can’t-” Xander tried to call out, but he was already out the door.
“Can’t what?” Willow asked.
“I was talking to Spike. I needed something and he went out. I’ll talk to you later, okay?”
“Alright, but if anything happens or if you think anyone found a way around the spells, let me know. I’m only looking out for you.”
“I will. Love you. Tell Buffy and Giles I said hi.”
“I’ll make sure of that. Bye, Xander.”
“See you, Willow.”
Xander hung up the phone and slumped back onto the bed. He sighed and looked at the bedroom door hoping to God that Drusilla didn’t wake up. He drummed his finger on his belly and felt a slight winced as one of the babies kicked his hand, which was weird because he shouldn’t be feeling them kick until much later. He’d consult the baby book Spike got him again. Spike, there was another problem. He had no idea why he had lied to Willow about Spike’s motive for leaving. He wasn’t even sure if Spike was coming back. He was sure Spike had better things to do than hang out with his sire who dumped him and the human who hated him. Spike was annoying anyway. For an evil vampire he was on the strict side. Not too many snacks, yoga in the mornings, pills in the afternoon, then no staying up to watch the late shows. Xander grinned, but Spike wasn’t here. It meant he could eat all the snack foods he wanted, no more yoga, no more pills; he could stay up as late as he wanted. He bounced off the pull out bed.
“Twinkieville, Daddy is coming home.”
After sulking in the sewers for a few hours, Spike decided to head home. He turned towards Xander’s and stopped himself. That was not home. That was where the annoying whelp lived who happened to possibly be carrying his unborn childer. This was a mess. Stupid whelp had probably already informed the Scoobies and they were happily hunting him down for knocking up their precious little pure human member. If anyone wanted Spike’s opinion, which they didn’t, the boy had one too many demon possessions.
“I’m knackered, I just want to sleep for a couple hundred years,” Spike said to himself.
He turned around and headed toward his crypt. If he was lucky it was exactly the way he left it. It he was unlucky another vampire or demon was occupying it and he would get to kick its demon arse right the hell out of his bloody home. That would be fun and would probably brighten his mood a bit. He was approaching his crypt when a few scents wafted towards him. He was always one for sex, blood, and beer, but he hadn’t been to the place in a month. He climbed through the gated off section which leading to the opening to the caverns which he had dug himself, no one, not even Harmony knew about this entrance. He stepped into his bedroom to be assaulted by loud techno music from above and moaning from under his sheets. This was not a good day to be shagging in William the Bloody’s bed. He stomped towards the bed and pulled back the sheets. He almost vomited when he was greeted by the image of a very naked Clem with a very naked Harmony. He yelped and threw the covers back on them.
“Blondie bear?” Harmony asked getting out of bed and not bothering to get dressed.
“Put your clothes on you stupid bint.”
“I’m on the run from Buffy and you weren’t here. Then your friend Clem said it was okay if I stayed.”
Spike turned to face the wall when he saw that Clem had finally decided to get of bed.
“That meant you could throw a party and shag in my bed? As far as ‘okay’ goes, I think that is way bloody far away from it.”
“You’re getting that deep British accent when you’re pissed at me,” Spike could hear the pout in her voice. “We’re vampires. I really thought you’d be okay with it.”
“Listen,” Clem said. “I know I messed up, but I honestly didn’t think you’d be back until you dealt with that crisis you were telling me about.”
“So that means you can- Get dressed. Party’s over.”
Spike did his best to make his way over to the ladder without looking at the two who had made no motion to get dressed. He made his way up the ladder and glared at the scene. He could see his busted telly in the corner and someone had somehow installed a black light, strobe light, and fog machine. Spike pushed his way through the crowd of demons and vampires until he found the stereo playing the music. He slammed it against the wall. Angry growls erupted and the party goers turned to face him. Spike pulled out a stake from one pocket and a short dagger from the other.
“Get out of my crypt now before I start slashing and staking.”
“This is Clem’s crypt. He’s borrowing it from William the Bloody,” one of the stupider fledges said.
Spike staked him and shifted to game face. Everyone took a step back, some closet to the crypt door left.
“I am William the fucking Bloody. I suggest you leave or I’ll show you all how I got my name.”
“I heard you got yourself chipped by those com-”
The demon didn’t get to finish its sentence when Spike used the dagger to lop off its head.
“Don’t stop me from hurting demons and fuck do I love weeding out the moronic from the not so moronic. I’ve made a decision. Anyone still in this crypt by the time I count to ten gets to be considered as a big moronic git and I get the pleasure of taking them out. One… Two…”
The crypt was emptied and Spike sighed. He pocketed his weapons and began shifting through his stuff. Everything he had worked so hard to collect from the garbage dump was ruined. He ran his hand along his telly. He had to go through seven piles just to find a working one. Brilliant, one out of control party and he was back where he started.
“Spike, I’m sorry,” a clothed Clem said coming up from the lower level.
“Sorry doesn’t cover it, mate.”
“Harmony, can you hand me that box?” Clem called down the hole.
“Oh, you mean the one with all of Blondie Bear’s stuff in it?” Harmony called back.
Clem looked uncomfortably at Spike who in turn raised an eyebrow at him.
“Don’t be mad, Spike. I was going to come over and tell you, but I didn’t know where you were staying. It’s hard to reach you; you don’t exactly have a cell phone.”
The box with Spike’s stuff was unceremoniously thrown up the hole and landed at Clem’s feet with a harsh crash. Spike forced a smile and wondered what of his Harmony just broke.
“Why is all my stuff in a box?”
“I had to make room for my things and I didn’t know where you were to give it to you.”
“Why would I let you stay here? If I did, I would have told you and at least laid down some ground rules. Sure, I left in a hurry, but the situation got out of control.”
“I’m sorry. I honestly thought it was okay. Just a few more days, staying here has really raised my rep in the demon world. Also, it’ll keep squatters out.”
Harmony climbed up the ladder, she was looking happily at Spike and bouncing about as if she had to go pee. Since Spike knew for a fact that Harmony didn’t have to pee, he knew she was excited about something.
“What is it Harmony?”
“You’re going to be staying with me from now on! I mean, no offense Clem, but you just aren’t as good as Blondie Bear when it comes you know,” she tried to imitate Spike’s accent, “shagging.”
“I’m staying, but you’re not.”
Harmony looked confused, “But then who will protect me from the slayer? We’re mortal enemies now. I have to stay here, if I don’t, she’ll stake me.”
“Why are you mortal enemies now?”
“I kidnapped her friend and smashed her window.”
“I did that too, but she doesn’t go around staking me.”
“I know, but- hey, your hair is different. It seems blonder. Spike! I can’t believe you dye your hair! I thought it was naturally blonde like that!”
Spike bit his lip holding back the urge to shake her until her bloody brain started working again. He didn’t want to be here anymore and just knowing they had been fucking in his bed. He really didn’t want to waste any time burning the sheets. He picked up his box, it jingled a bit and wondered what the hell could have broken.
“Harm,” he said slowly. “You can keep the place and Clem. I don’t mind. I have another place lined up. You shag under my Italian silk covers all you want, you won’t see me again, I promise.”
“What about poker night?” Clem asked.
Spike had forgotten about that, “Yeah, well, keep your kittens. I don’t need them.”
Spike left the crypt completely pissed. He guessed he had to go crawling back to Xander.
Xander didn’t feel well. He wasn’t even in the ballpark of well. He had eaten five Twinkies, a tub of ice cream, and two bags of potato chips. It wasn’t that he was hungry or that he was craving it, it was just that he could have Twinkies, ice cream, and potato chips. He had gotten over excited and finished everything he had pulled out for himself. He was about to get up and go for the leftover pizza when the door opened. He expected it to be Drusilla who had left a few hours ago, but instead it was Spike carrying a box.
“You okay?” Spike said looking over Xander. “You look all sickly. You ain’t dying are you? I’m not taking you to the doctor, I just got in.”
“No, what the hell are you doing back? I thought you were going to the crypt.”
“I did. I’m back. I never said I wasn’t coming back, you were the one that didn’t want me around,” Spike said tilting his head to the side trying to gauge his reaction. “Something about someone being unwanted.”
“I was talking about the spell. Seriously, why the hell are you back? After that fight we had, I thought I’d never see you again. Not that I wanted to. I just need someone to pick up after me. You know, like you did before.”
Spike looked over the mess on the couch, “I hope you ain’t expecting me to pick that up. I ain’t your bloody slave. Spell’s over. I figure best we could do is put up with what we got until the bits are born, then I can be out of your hair. There’s nothing more to us either. I’m your roommate. Same rules as the basement apply, along with the one where you pick up after yourself.”
“But my tummy hurts,” Xander whined.
“Fine, but while I’m getting the Tums, you better clean up your mess and no more eating like this. You’re going to stick to the list. I don’t want any extra doctor visits. That bugger gives me bad vibes.”
Xander watched Spike disappear into the bathroom. He sighed, of course he had to come back and be Mr. Bossy again. Any excuse to be in charge was good enough for him. Xander began picked up the empty tub and stuffed the finished bags of potato chips and Twinkies in it. He went into the kitchen and tossed them into the trash. Xander felt his stomach; it was hard to believe that he was pregnant. This was going to take some getting used to. He grabbed a glass from the cabinet, filled it with water, and went to sit back down on the pull out bed. He watched Spike enter the living room. His blonde hair was messed and Xander had to admit, the new color was nice. Xander smiled at least the kids had a handsome father. Xander’s smile soon faded, leftover spell stuff, he so did not just think Spike was handsome.
“What’s got your knickers in a twist?”
“Hey, isn’t knickers girl underwear?”
Spike shrugged and handed him the bottle, “Instructions said they were safe to use during pregnancy since they’re made of calcium. So, they’re actually good for you.”
Xander opened the bottle and took out one of the tablets and stuck it in his mouth. He slowly drank as Spike watched him.
“I feel a bit better, but you actually read the label to see if it was okay for me to have?”
“Didn’t want to have to waste the night by taking you to get your stomach pumped,” Spike pointed out.
“It’s good to know you care.”
“Yeah, it’s-” Spike clutched his head and had a pained look on his face.
“Did the chip fire? Spike, what’s wrong? Spike?”
Spike didn’t look up at him, he just clutched his head. Tears sprung to his eyes and Xander felt pain to. It wasn’t his pain; it was the babies’ pain. He could feel her getting distressed and her energy building while the other one was kicking madly. Xander groaned in pain and Spike looked up at him.
“Spike, what’s going on? Why are we in pain?”
“My sire just died. Drusilla, she’s been dusted,” his voice cracking with the strain of holding back tears.
“And we’re feeling it?”
“Of course! Every vampire can feel when they lose an important member of their family. I’m sure Angel is feeling the loss too. Not that he’d bloody do anything about it or come to give his condolences, but still, it hurts when you loss someone in your family.”
“The babies are feeling her lose too?”
“Of course they are, they’re her family, aren’t they? Both are part vampire, probably doesn’t hurt as much as it hurts me, but it still hurts.”
Xander didn’t realize how hard Spike was trying to hold back. Spike wanted to yell, explode, and most of all cry over the loss of his sire, but he refused to do so while Xander was still here.
“Do you know how she died or who killed her?”
“No, just know she’s dust. I plan to find out though. It better not have been the slayer. I don’t care if Dru didn’t love me like she used to, she was my world. If it was Buffy, my chip be damned, I’ll rip her apart, I’ll tear her limb from limb.”
Xander patted Spike’s back awkwardly, “I’m sure it wasn’t Buffy. She wouldn’t want to hurt me or you. She might not seem like it, but she can be very understanding at times. We’ll find who killed her.”
“You don’t even like her though.”
“Well, she’s their grandmother and um, as weird as it sounds, nobody stakes my babies’ grandmother, even if she was evil and soulless, then also drank human blood occasionally, well, all the time really and she was insane, but um, she had the visions thing going for her. Those were nice.”
Spike nodded seriously, “That was a lovely eulogy, Harris. I think she would have enjoyed it.”
Xander gave Spike an odd look and secretly whispered a small prayer that the babies didn’t inherit the Aurelius family craziness.