Summary: After his relationship with Anya fizzles out Xander and Spike become lovers. Xander’s insecurities lead him to seek help from
Notes: AU begins S6 replacing Hells Bells. No Dawn, Buffy didn’t die, and Season 6 Spuffy? Eewww no.
Feedback appreciated and lusted for
Disclaimer: not mine, all belongs to Joss and Co. Damn them. And bless them.
Other chapters are here
Beta thanks to kitty_alex
Apart from the fact that he had an eye on the door, an ear tuned to the smallest of noises outside and a fire inside that threatened to manifest itself in a most inappropriate way, it was just a normal night around the research table for Xander.
Giles remained immersed in his bookwork; apparently the business of profit and loss was far more interesting than Xander’s new alternative lifestyle and unconventional choice of partner. The girls however, had what seemed to be an endless supply of questions, some of which he answered, others he sidestepped and a few he outright refused to answer.
Yes, he was happy. Yes, Spike was too. No, he hadn’t helped Spike bleach his hair yet. And no, he wouldn’t be bleaching his own. Yes, they sometimes argued. No, he wouldn’t tell them what about. Yes, he had really truly bitten Spike. No, he would not discuss the circumstances. Ever. Yes, Spike was as well muscled as he’d imagined. No, Anya, he would not elaborate on that with a quick sketch. He’d known as soon as Anya returned from her dinner date that the theme of the questions would take a turn.
Xander could tell the girls were itching to ask personal questions, but after he’d declined to address more intimate issues, they’d soon recognised his boundaries. He knew Spike wouldn’t be too impressed if he shared their private matters and really, Xander had no desire expose them in that way. It was apparent that Buffy and Willow were still apprehensive regarding Spike, but in the interests of maintaining the new found status quo with Xander, they very obviously withheld a great deal of their questions.
Anya however, could be relied upon to be brutally honest and painfully blunt as always. Was Spike satisfying? Pass. Was Spike adventurous? Pass. Was Spike a giver or a taker? Pass and pass again. And same for the next ten questions, pass in bulk and save the trouble of asking them. Xander also politely refused to ask her about her sex life with Simon; questions, she pointed out, that she would be fully prepared to answer in a much more gratifying way than he had. Xander laughed to himself at her disappointment.
The issues of his consort strengths came up and Xander discussed these more easily; his enhanced sense of smell, his vision and hearing, some strength, better coordination and faster healing. He made no mention of the sexual stamina, however that was thoughtfully brought up by Anya, just in case he’d forgotten. The girls tried to touch on the bond between him and Spike but again, he tiptoed around that, just briefly outlining it but explaining how he felt it was just too private a thing to discuss.
In the interests of keeping everything between them relatively open, and avoiding any surprises and confrontations in the future, Xander decided to broach the subject of his longevity with his friends. He hoped that if all his cards were on the table, then their relationship could flow much more smoothly from here on out.
“There is one more thing that I got from Spike, I guess it might come out of the healing but I don’t know, it could be a separate thing altogether.”
Anya was sitting next to him and he could see and almost feel the serious mood suddenly drop over her. “It’s separate Xander.”
“No I haven’t but I guess Anya is just a bit more aware of these things with her background.” He felt Anya take the hand that was resting in his lap. “Apart from the need for blood and the demon face, I got everything that makes Spike strong.” He waited a moment, hoping that one of them would get it. It was no longer a heart wrenching thought for him but still gave him pause for thought, and the thoughts sometimes hurt. When he saw that they didn’t understand he sighed. “Spike is more than one hundred and twenty years old. Unless he is staked, or beheaded, or burnt, he’s going to be two hundred and twenty, or three hundred and twenty. So am I.”
“Oh, Xan. Are you sure?” Buffy asked. “Maybe the spell-.”
“Not the spell Buff. That would have done it anyway, but no, it’s part of your standard consort package.”
Anya was squeezing his hand and while it felt strange not being Spike’s, it was also familiar and comforting. “It took me a long time to come to grips with it, but I think I’m okay about it now. It raises a whole bunch of issues for me, less for you I suppose. I kinda would prefer not to have to rehash everything again, it was a bad few days when I found out. Maybe one day in the future we can sit down and go over it all but for now, I’m okay with it and if we could just brush the details under the rug I’d be eternally grateful. No pun intended.”
“Xan you didn’t say anything? Didn’t let us help?”
“No offence intended Will, but what could you have said or done?”
“Xander’s right,” Anya said. “I don’t think you can imagine the thoughts and feelings you have. Xander needed to work through with it someone who’s been there.” She turned a mock glare on him. “Although why he didn’t call me I just don’t know.”
“Sorry Ahn. Needed a different kind of someone for that.”
She smiled with understanding. “I know. But you can talk to me any time okay?”
He squeezed her fingers and returned her smile. “So now, everything I know, you know. That’s about it.”
“Talk about finishing on a high note.”
“Course I can die Will. It just means that if I can stay away from the dangerous end of the swords and demons, I get a few more birthday cakes than you. Oh, and presents too.” He tried to make light of it to avoid bringing down the girls’ mood and his as well. There had been enough tears over this issue.
They picked up on this thankfully and began an earnest discussion on what would make an appropriate hundredth birthday present for someone who was not incontinent in a wheelchair, sucking on stewed apples. Anya contributed the demon version of the traditional gifts for birthdays ending in double zero, but as the one hundredth involved the ritual flaying and wearing of a hybrid demon wildebeest, Xander refused to hear the rest and decided to go with Willow’s suggestion of a pair of fuzzy slippers. Her thinking was that no matter how old a man was he would always need warm feet. Knowing how much Spike liked to soak up Xander’s body heat, he had to agree. The girls very obviously avoided the fact that, barring any further supernatural intervention, they would not be there to buy him those gifts. Xander glanced over at Giles and could easily tell from the watcher’s expression that none of this was news to him.
It was just after midnight when the door burst open and Spike returned carrying a large cardboard box. Xander’s heart rate immediately sped up as he got an enormous boost of hyped energy from Spike. He could feel how tightly wound Spike was; apparently he’d had a very good night.
Spike dropped the box in the doorway and bounded across the room to Xander. “Hello consort,” he said, grabbing Xander by the neck, tipping his head back and thoroughly kissing him, with one hand down the front of his shirt.
Xander’s muffled protest died away and he hung on to Spike’s coat to stop himself toppling over. He tasted smoke and copious amounts of whiskey, but underneath that Xander could detect minute traces of blood, a thought he quickly pushed away to deal with later. Through the bond, he felt like he’d either gotten a shot of adrenaline or eaten a few hundred pixie sticks. Xander blushed furiously as Spike let him back up and he faced the girls.
Buffy, Tara and
“Stopping now pet, cause if I don’t the slayer and the witches here will get more than their delicate eyes bargained for,” Spike told her.
“And let’s not forget the watcher,” Giles’ voice came from behind the counter. “There is only so much I am able to block out by taking these off.” He waved his glasses.
“Come on now Rupert, you’re not trying to tell me your poor sensibilities are offended?”
“The boundaries of my sensibilities are not open for discussion Spike.”
Spike snorted at him, looked pointedly at Anya till she vacated her seat, then dropped down heavily next to Xander. “So love. What are we talking about? Did you get everything sorted out with these bints?” Spike ignored the girls’ protests at his language, threw his arm around Xander’s neck and focused on him with a hard unblinking stare.
“Um yeah, I ah-, we-, um,” Xander found it extraordinarily difficult to concentrate on simple sentences while under Spike’s intense scrutiny. The lingering taste in his mouth and the heady pulses of lust Spike was pouring through their bond were fogging his brain. “Don’t you want to go home?”
“Soon love,” he smirked. “Want you to tell me about your night first. Did they give you a hard time? Do I need to growl at anyone?”
“No it’s all fine, the girls know everything; all the consort stuff and its cool.” He turned to Buffy and
They both agreed. “All hunky dory Xan,”
“You wouldn’t tell them something love? What would that be?” Spike asked him.
Anya jumped in. “Xander seems to think that bites and bonds are off limits, I tried to tell him that you wouldn’t mind if he told us, but no. It’s all private and personal and no Anya, this is one of those things you don’t talk about in polite company. But now you’re here Spike and you’ve never been polite company, so can we know now?”
“If my consort says no, then it’s no.” He looked at Xander. “Still no?”
“Still hell no.”
Spike nodded his satisfaction, then jumped back to his feet. “Right then, everybody’s happy. I’d love to stick around and hear about everything that happened but that’s an outright lie, I actually don’t care a whit, so we’re going. Ready mate?”
“Ah, yeah, sure.” Xander stood and did the rounds, hugging the girls and stopped at
“No problem Xander, just come over when you’re ready.”
Spike hovered impatiently, pulling on Xander’s arm while he said his goodbyes. “Oh, okay it looks like we’re in a hurry, bye guys, see you tomorrow.” Xander laughed as Spike hauled him up to the door, collected his carton and shoved Xander in the direction of the car.
Xander fished out his keys and just managed a quick breath before Spike dropped his box and pounced on him. He was all hands, lips and teeth as he pressed Xander against the car door.
Xander eventually pulled away, panting for breath. “Spike let’s take this home. You can have a shower, get all that goop off you, whatever that is, get all these clothes off me then pick up where we leave off. Sound okay?”
Spike pulled Xander’s shirt loose and his hands slid underneath, while his leg worked itself between Xander’s. “We could do that love, or we could skip all that and I could take you over the bonnet of your car.” His lips went to Xander’s neck and he nuzzled the scar while his fingers pinched at Xander’s nipples.
Xander fought against the mindless passion from Spike surging through him and the sensations Spike was creating at his neck, chest and groin. “It’s a hood, and not a chance in hell Bleachie. I don’t care how hot you are, you are not fucking me in the street.”
Spike’s hand slipped down inside Xander’s jeans and wrapped around the hard shaft. “Are you sure love, it would be quick, or slow, however you like it. I could pull your jeans down, spread you open, slick you up and slide right in.” Spike’s voice washed over him, low and smooth. “Face down love, or on your back, either way you would spread you legs for me, come for me when you feel me fill you. And bite you.” He not so gently pressed his blunt teeth into Xander’s neck.
Spike’s words, his cool breath, his strong hands, his lips and teeth all worked together against Xander’s inhibitions. Xander gripped Spike’s face in his hands and brought their lips together in a deep and frantic kiss as he thrust himself into Spike’s fist. He never knew how far he would have let it go, he only knew that he was disappointed and thankful all at once when a slamming door further down the street brought him back to himself.
Reluctantly? Gratefully? Whichever way, he pushed himself away from Spike. “God, I love you, and you have no idea how much I want you right now, but we are so going home before you have me doing something I really think I might regret.”
“Are you sure love? Hard and fast, a bit of a warm up before we get home? You smell so bloody good I don’t think I could last long anyway.” Spike’s hand still worked him. “I had a busy night mate and you know what a good fight does for me.”
Again there was a niggling thought in the back of Xander’s mind as he wondered what Spike had done while he was out; and again he refused to think about it. Instead he gently removed Spike’s hand from his pants, then groaned as Spike slowly and deliberately licked the dampness off his fingers.
“No I’m not sure, but let’s go anyway. I’m so not ready for the girls to interrupt this. Not that I’ll ever be ready for that but you know what I mean, Bleachie. I need you, but not here please.
There was no disappointment coming from Spike, just an urgent passion and want, the edge of that softened by his feelings of love. “Get in the car then Harris.” Spike pushed him through the driver’s side door then raced around to his own side, throwing his carton in the back seat. “The sooner you get me home, the sooner I get you shagged yeah?”
As they drove home, Xander’s mind began to wander despite Spike’s rapid fire description of the various demons and vampires he’d fought and killed. Smoke, whiskey and blood. And blood. But whiskey? “Spike did you go to the Lion or Willy’s tonight?” He interrupted Spike’s graphic explanation of what happens when you take the head off a Souadian demon.
Spike shook his head. “Not tonight love. I wouldn’t go out on the town without you. Why?”
“Whiskey, Spike. You taste like whiskey. Other things too, but the whiskey is fresh.”
“Oh right. I stopped by the crypt and packed up the last of my stuff, that’s what’s in the box. Clem was a bit lonely so I had a couple of drinks with him before I left. Something wrong love?”
“Just wondering I guess.”
“You’d tell me if there was something wouldn’t you? I’m so keyed up and horny right now I can’t think straight, let alone sort out what’s coming through the bond.”
Xander laughed softly. “I know Bleachie, I can feel it. We’ll be home soon, don’t worry. We have all night for you to work that energy off.”
As it was, Spike’s energy lasted for the remainder of the night and well past dawn and Xander easily kept pace. They were both thankful for Xander’s consort stamina and by the time Spike was finally shagged out, the scar on Xander’s neck had been reopened twice, along with Spike’s. The second and third time Spike had bitten him had been powerful but nowhere near as intense as the first. Again for the few minutes immediately after, they were able to induce another orgasm merely by stimulating the area of the bite.
Xander marvelled at how much closer he felt to Spike after having been claimed as consort. He wouldn’t have thought it would get any better than it had been in the last week, but he’d been more than pleased to be mistaken. He knew his feelings were reciprocated as they echoed back at him through the bond. Contentedly, he realised that he would have little opportunity to ever question Spike’s devotion to him or to feel insecure within their relationship. Everything was so open to him now he could never have any doubts. Completely sated and spent, he wound himself snugly in Spike’s arms and slept until well into the afternoon.
Xander gradually surfaced and found himself face to face with Spike, both of them using the same pillow. A slow broad smile grew as Xander lay quietly and examined Spike’s face. He wondered if he could kiss Spike without waking him. Probably not. Could he maybe lick that corner of his mouth? Nah. Xander satisfied himself with watching Spike sleep. Okay so it was not the most exciting thing to do since Spike was no more than a corpse in their bed. Necrophilia. People said it like it was a bad thing. Xander tried not to laugh, then jumped violently when Spike’s clear voice surprised him.
“Harris what are you doing?”
Spike opened his eyes. “Why?”
“Cause I love you and I’m thinking about how many times I’m going to be able to wake up like this.”
“That makes you laugh?” he asked with one eyebrow cocked.
“Nah, just having stupid thoughts too.”
“One of the things I love about you mate. You’re an idiot.”
“You’ve had over a hundred years and you still haven’t got a handle on romantic have you?”
“You wake me up while the sun’s still out, after shagging me silly for hours and you want romance?”
“No, not really. You get all romantic and I’d be worried you were possessed or something. Okay well possessed by something different and scarier.”
“Oi! I’m plenty scary.” Spike wormed his way closer and pulled a laughing Xander in, running his hands down his back and circling their hips together. “Got it, love. No romance, we just get down to business.”
Xander smiled and kissed him, loath to stop but forcing himself anyway. “No Bleachie. No romance, no business. I have an elsewhere to be.”
“You’re off to see the witches?”
“No love, I might drop in on a mate and see if I can get a bit of work.”
“That guy who fixes your coat?”
“Yeah I haven’t been for a while and he probably needs me. Now the chip is gone, there might be a bit of extra work too.”
Xander frowned. “What do you mean?”
“The Zeeum has a mix of clients, human and demon. He never sent me after the humans before cause I couldn’t rough them up. Chip’s gone, now I can take care of all his runners.”
This information didn’t sit well with Xander. He wanted to ask what Spike’s work for the Zeeum entailed but wasn’t sure if he truly wanted to know. He’d gone into this relationship knowing exactly what his lover was. He’d accepted the claim, knowing Spike’s chip was gone and everything that meant. He felt now he had no right to be concerned about what Spike did when he was out.
“Love, you weren’t any good at hiding your feelings before I could sense them. You’re even worse now. I don’t kill any of these clients, just shake them up a bit till the money they owe appears.”
Xander shook his head and gave a weak smile. “No it’s okay Spike, I understand. I don’t want to stop you doing what you do.”
“I’m not going to stop, it’s where the cash comes from love. Which reminds me. I cleaned out a nest of fledges, particularly stupid fledges who had taken to a bit of banditry. There’s some cash in the closet, help yourself if you like.”
Xander thought about that. The money had been stolen from someone or somewhere, he wasn’t sure if he could take it, but he had no problem with Spike spending it. “Spike that’s your money, you use it how you want. I have enough of my own for what I need.”
“Problem with it love?”
Xander answered honestly. “No, not really. I’d just feel a bit weird taking it is all.”
Spike felt Xander’s confusion but also the truth in his answers and was okay with that. “Suit yourself mate. I won’t apologise for where I get my cash. Not like I can get a nine to five is it?”
“No? I think I could see you in a suit and tie with a briefcase, sitting at a big shiny desk. A dark blue suit. White shirt. Yeah I can see that.”
“You’ve put a bit of thought into that love,” Spike laughed.
Xander kissed him. “Nah, I think I like you best in your black. It has that Big Bad feel to it. Suits you.”
“Smooth talker.” Spike snorted.
They spent a short time lying together before Xander checked the clock and cut short Spike’s amorous efforts to keep him in bed. Showered and changed, he made arrangements to meet up with Spike later for dinner at the Lion. Xander kept up a smiling happy face until Spike had dropped down into the tunnel access two doors down, then let his thoughts flood him.
Despite what he’d told Spike, he still wasn’t sure what he felt about Spike’s work. It had been different when it was just demons. But now Spike was free and there were humans in the mix. Spike said it was only a bit of a shake down but the hints of blood Xander had detected in Spike’s kiss last night came back to him.
Pushing aside his concerns, wanting to take Spike at his word, Xander headed for the girls’ house. At least he would be able to set his mind to rest about the spell.