bmblbee (bmblbee) wrote in bloodclaim,

Happy Birthday

Title: Happy Birthday
Author: BmblBee Illustrator : Petxnd
Rating: NC-17
Paring: S/X
Disclaimer: We own none of the characters used in this story and make no profit.
Warning: M/M explicit language and activity.
Summary: It is Xander's birthday and his friends want to give him a present.
The moral of this story is that sometimes a little white lie can reveal a bigger truth.
Submitted for Fall For S/X.

The front door swung open wide and slammed shut with a solid 'wham' as
Buffy hurried past the living room and into the kitchen, wheezing, out of breath.

"I know. I know. Don't say it. I'm late."

Quickly Willow grabbed the large box out of Buffy's hands and set it
down on the kitchen counter. Carefully, she lifted the cardboard box lid
and peeked inside.

"HEY! What happened? It's mooshed."

Flinging her arms in the air dramatically, Buffy flopped her slightly shapeless
ass onto the nearest kitchen chair, her unnaturally blond haired ponytail
swayed from side to side.

"That's what I was trying to tell you. I very nearly was killed in a fiery,
freeway, news at 11:00, car crash."

Willow immediately felt guilty over her concern for the damaged baked goods
and turned her attention to her friend.
"Oh, hell, Buffy, what happened?"

Buffy shuddered as she recalled the morning's near catastrophic event.
"Well, I was coming from the Bread Head Bakery, minding my own business,
and some jerk nearly slammed into the side of me. If he hadn't swerved to the
left, I would be waiting on a helicopter to be life flighted to the nearest trauma
center as we speak."

Willow scooted her chair next to her friend, enthralled at the story.
"Wow! How did it happen?"

"Well, I had just finished painting my nails so you know I was only using my
thumbs to text with, which, of course, meant that I had to balance my Mammoth
milkshake between my knees and toss the term paper I was studying on the
dashboard. Anyway, I came to the intersection of Walk and Don't Walk and
the sign said 'Yield'."

"So what happened then?"
"Well, being the excellent driver that I am, I followed the sign and yield. In fact
I even rolled the window down, stuck my head out and yielded as loud as I could.
'Coming through!', I yielded, but apparently he didn't hear me cause he just came
out of nowhere."

Buffy slumped back in her seat, exhausted from the shock. Willow slapped
her hands to her mouth in shock.
"Then, I hit the brake, he swerved, and the cake slid to the floor. I'm telling you,
Willow, some of these idiots should NOT be allowed on the roads."

Willow nodded her agreement and again checked the cake to assess the damage.
It was dented on the left and the right side had an odd finger shaped swipe
across the green icing. Willow noted that it must be a popular color as it matched
a spot on Buffy's chin exactly.

"Well, I guess we can cover it up when we put the candles on. You did get the
candles, didn't you? I mean Xan will only turn 21 once. We really need candles."

Buffy did her best not to look guilty.
"Um, funny you should ask. I'm slightly embarrassed, financially, at the moment.
But, hey, I have a Bic lighter that Spike left here last night. We can duct tape it open
stick it in and, PRESTO!"

Willow frowned in confusion.
"Spike was here last night?"

Buffy rolled her eyes.
"Yeah, he will do anything to spend time with me. He makes up all sorts of bogus
excuses. Last night it was twenty questions about Xander. How old is he? What
sort of things does he like? Is he gay? You know, that kind of stuff. Spike really
is pathetic with this obsession over me."

Willow waved her hand dismissively.
"Pfft. Men. Even ones of the vampiric persuasion. They are so predictably...manlike."

Buffy slapped the table to emphasize her awe.
"Oh, God Willow, you just ooze chunks of insitefulness!"

Willow shrugged modestly, then wrinkled her nose.
"So, I take it you couldn't afford to buy him anything either?"
"No. I spent my last ten on the valet at the magic shop."
"Giles hired a valet service?"
"No and when the cops recovered my car, the kid and the ten bucks were gone."

Willow immediately jumped up and ran to open a drawer in the kitchen hutch.
"No matter. I've been working on an idea. We can give him exactly what he
wants for his birthday. His choice."

Fumbling around, she pulled out three blank recipe cards and a small
black marker which she proceeded to carefully wrap in discarded, saved,
Frosty the snowman Christmas paper as Buffy stood frowning behind her.

"TA DA!!"
Willow held it up proudly.

"Ooooookaa. And exactly what the fuck is that?"
Buffy waited patiently for an explanation, her chin resting on her palm.

Willow was more than happy to give all the details of her perfect plan.
"They are specially, spelled wish cards. Xander gets three. He fills them
out then lights them on fire. When the smoke clears, he gets his wishes!
Presto, chango, perfect gift for the man who has nothing."

Buffy squinted skeptically.
"Is that for real or are you just bullshitting?"

Willow shuffled her feet nervously and tried to use her powers of
legerdemain to conjure up a convincing excuse before deciding that that
was simply out of the scope of her capability.

"Well, damn it Buffy, I didn't see you coughing up any money for this. Shit,
after we went halvsies on the cake, which YOU by the way squished, and I paid
on those socks I've had on lay-a-way for the past month, I was tapped out.
Sides, do you know how freakin' much they get for snakes feet and toad
ears these days? It's highway robbery!"

Buffy stood, outraged, her hands on her bony hips and considered any number
of critical comments. She thought about driving to the store and buying
something herself. She wondered about maybe a gift card or a magazine
subscription. Finally, she marched to the same drawer and began
rooting towards the back.

"Yeah, o.k. I think I have a bow back here somewhere from last valentines day.
Stick it on top. It will look less cheesy. But remember, we have to be convincing
or Xan will mistakenly think we're cheap."

Knowing they were almost out of time, Willow grabbed some plates from the
cupboard and forks from the drawer. Buffy located the wrinkled, well used
paper bow and paused as she reached for the package.
"Ah, Willow, won't he figure it out? I mean, when he makes a wish and it
doesn't come true, I think he will guess that it ain't legit."

Willow's eyes lit up and she bubbled.
"No, see that's the great part. I was going to tell him that since this is the
hell mouth, I put a protection clause in it. If anything he wishes for could come
back to bite him on the ass, the wish won't work. He will just figure that nothing
is happening because he is making the wrong wishes."

Buffy's mouth fell open and her eyes bugged.
"HOLY MARY ON A MUFFIN! You...are..a...genius! That is just
fucking brilliant!"

Before Willow had the chance to bow and accept the accolades being tossed
her way, the women were startled from their conspiracy as the kitchen
door flew open.

"What's brilliant? Besides me, the birthday boy. Hello ladies, I have
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