Title: COUNT LUFFTON
3/26
Author: BmblBee
Paring: S/X, AU
Rating: Adult NC17 for language and M/M sexual content.
Disclaimer: The Bee owns nothing including the characters and
products named in this story.
Warnings: Sex, violence and character death. Yes, the mouse
dies.
Summary: This story is a followup to Mouse but it is not necessary
to have read it. Xander brings Spike home to kill a mouse.
The mouse escaped and Spike stayed for the fun, games
and conflicts that S/X always get up to. One night Spike
gets more than a little drunk and does something stupid.

Comments: The last few stories have been drama and trauma. I felt
we needed some lighthearted fluff, comedy and stupidity.

Thanks to: Petxnd for her preread and suggestions and to Silk Labyrinth
for her betaing of boo boos. It should be noted that if any
irregularities remain it is due to the Bee's bullheadedness.





Xander had paused in the execution of his menial task. Giles had told him
to mop the floor after it had become clear that his contribution to the group's
researching was less than helpful. The truth was, Xander's mind was not
on the dusty tomes or the demon of the week. Xander's brain, as well as
the rest of his body, was focused on another sort of creature.

A vampire.

But not just any vampire. Not a fresh-from-the-grave, moldy sort of creature.
Not a black cape wielding, pointy-eared character that mumbles in a thick
Transylvanian accent, "I vant to suck your blood."

No, Xander is fixated on one particular vampire. A sexy, blond, tea and crumpet
talking motha fucker. A vampire that steals the covers, crowds the shower and
gives him orgasms that nearly blow the top of Xander's head off. And speaking
of blowing....

Xander sighed and leaned on the handle of his mop. He checked the time on the
Winnie the Pooh clock that hung over the entranceway to the training room, and he
knew that any minute now, said vampire would slither through the front door like
a snake up a hot rock. He had wanted to come in earlier with Xander, but Xander
refused. It may elicit questions that Xander didn't want to answer.

He was not yet ready for his friends to know that he and the vamp were again
roomies. That would lead to questions, concerns, warnings, sudden unplanned
confessions, shocked disgust, possible staking and, in the end, the others would
issue a stamp of disapproval on Xander's life. And that was the one thing he
feared most. Disapproval.

He knew Spike didn't care. Shit, Spike gave less than a fuck about what anyone
thought of him, and Xander envied that cavalier attitude. He envied it but was unable
to share in it. The result of this difference of opinion had been one long, ongoing
argument. Spike insisted that their coupleism be made known, and Xander begged
him for confidentiality.

Xander feared it may come to a choice and he had no idea which side of the fence
he would eventually have to pick. But that was for later. For now, he and the
fanged one were together. Snuggling, shagging, snacking, fucking, watching the
telly, humping...I think you see the pattern. And Xander was happy.

Finally, the door flew open and Xander didn't have to look up from his janitorial
duties to know. The second the vamp entered the room, the atmosphere became
charged with static electricity. It caused Xander's nipples to harden and the hair
all over his body to raise and crinkle.

Xander let a near-hysterical giggle slip from his lips, which caused the others to
glance up at him curiously and briefly before they returned to more important issues.

Spike took a moment to observe the mundane activities before marching over and
dropping down on his assigned seat. Third step from the bottom. Seemed like he
was spending a lot of time on the bottom now days. Not that he minded particularly.
The boy was bloody brilliant when it came to working the flesh and tapping the tush.

For the most part, he was a happy vamp. For the most part. As for the rest, he
was a simmering pot of discontent. He had a new residence, a willing partner and
nearly all the sex he could handle. It was enough to make a vamp squeal with delight.
Except that squealing was verboten! Field Marshall Harris had ordered that no
hint of their sextracurricular activities were to be mentioned around the sensitive
ears of the slugs he referred to as friends.

Spike slumped back on the step and watched as his boy engaged in yet another
degrading chore. Fuck, the boy acted as though he hadn't even noticed when Spike
arrived. As though he hadn't been buried balls deep in a certain vampire arse not
two hours ago, whooping and humping like a kangaroo in heat.

Spike scowled. He had to be honest. It was more than the sex. He had a strange
fondness for the boy that Spike attributed to a sponginess of his reattached soul.
As soon as someone showed a bit of kindness to him, the vamp fell and this time
he had fallen hard. And damn it all to hell, he wanted everyone to know!

Engrossed in his own commiseration, Spike didn't see as Xander had worked his
mop around to the area of the Magic Box where Spike sat with a puppy on his face
the size of a bull mastiff. Suddenly, he glanced up and the boy was directly in
front of him.

The power of the heat and fierce sexuality that emanated from Xander's dark eyes
climbed right into Spike's tight jeans and wrapped itself around his dick in a near
stranglehold. Slowly and hypnotically Spike's hand rose from his lap and reached
out to touch the growing bulge in his boy's jeans but, just before it made contact,
Xander stepped back and looked away.

It was like a slap on the hand. It was a correction of behavior that was downright
insulting! He was no small child attempting to pilfer a cookie! He was William
the Bloody and that was the final fucking straw. It was time for a change. Now!

Spike jumped up in a ball of barely controlled fury that sent chills of yummy fear
skittering across Xander's skin.

"I'm going back to the training room and I'm taking the boy with me."

Spike clamped his hand on the back of the apparently reluctant neck and he began
steering Xander towards the room in the back of the shop. The others showed
little interest and only Giles gave a response.

"Yes, well, don't hurt him, Spike. Now, Buffy, are you certain that was a mf'divr
demon that tried to attack you?"

Spike paid no attention as Buffy went into great detail of how the demon had tried
to get under her skirt and attach itself to her body. Instead, he dragged his pet,
who dropped the wet mop to the floor, into the training room and slammed the
door behind them. Once alone, Xander grinned and pressed himself against the
cool body of his oddly rigid vampire.

"Well, well, lookie here. We are all alone. How about a little smoochie smooch?"

Spike turned his head. The thin line of his pursed lips left no doubt that this
impromptu rendezvous was no booty call.

"NO. There will be some changes made or you can just smoochie smooch my
white arse. I am tired of being your dirty little secret. I have my pride, you know,
and being treated like something to be ashamed of does not set well. Not well
at all. I want you to tell them about us or....or.....or I may just pull the plug on
this bathtub!"

Xander ran his hand up the vampire's chest, certain that the heat of his skin would soak
through Spike's black tee and soften his cold heart. His voice took on a coaxing,
nudging tone as he moved in closer. They had this same argument almost daily and
Xander was well practiced in diversion and redirection.

"Come on, Spike. Don't be like that. You know I want that too and when the time
is right...."

"And just when will that be, love? Tuesday? Friday? 2025?"

Xander stepped back. Spike was not melting and Xander knew that this time things
would not end on a moan, a groan and an orgasm. He crossed his arms over his
chest.

"I don't know, Spike. I don't know when that will be but I don't like being forced.
I told you. When the time is right...."

"Well, I'm saying that the time is now. I want you to tell them now."

Xander tipped his head slightly and accepted the challenge.

"I don't want to. So there. Now what?"

Spike straightened himself up to his full height of 5'10". He smoothed back his stiff,
plastered hair and he snorted in obvious disgust. With nothing more to talk about,
he turned on his heel and started to walk away. Immediately the horrible fear of
losing his vampire gripped Xander and he reached out.

"Wait. I'm sorry. It's just that.... Where are you going? Will you be home later?"

Spike paused with his hand on the door handle but he did not look back. He knew
if he looked into those beautiful brown eyes he would be sunk, and this time he
needed to stand firm.

"I'm going to Willy's to get royally pissed. Then I intend to find a few demons to
beat the hell out of. After that, I don't know. Far be it from me to be somewhere
that I am not wanted."

"Spike. Wait. You are wanted. I do want...."

But it was too late. The vampire had left the building.