Rating: R for language
Warnings: None
Disclaimer: The boys do belong to me, but only in a 'I'm obviously delusional and need some psychiatric help' kinda way!
Feedback: would be lovely – who knows how long my new-found muse will stick around, but I know she loves praise/concrit!
Poetry Lesson VI : Acceptance
"We're going to have to leave aren't we?" Xander lifted his head from Spike's chest so he could look him in eye.
"Yeah, Pet, we are. Somehow don't think you're gonna be able to hide that from the Slayer for too long, and once she sees it she's gonna know I've got my bite back". Spike's fingers traced the claim scar lightly eyebrow quirking at Xander's shivery reaction.
"But the chip hasn't been working for months and you haven't done anything too evil - don't you think she would listen?"
"Xander, come on luv. It took something as drastic as Angelus for them to realise how we felt about each other, which is fucking stupid since it's bloody obvious. They won't believe I'm not noshing on the local populace just because we say I'm not".
"But..."
"No, forget it luv. Besides, I need to get cracking on finding out what's going on with Peaches. Whether that soul has been shoved back up his fat arse or not, we're gonna have a little chat about his latest visit..."
"Spike, you know I hate Deadboy at least as much as you do but do you really want to get into a fight with him?"
"Wot - you think I can't beat him?! Leave it out Xander - Angelus has only been free a few days, so the poof has mainly been living on fucking animal shite and fighting sewer rats for the last century. I've been on human blood since before the chip came out - he stands no chance". Spike couldn't keep the note of pride out of his voice - Xander had sourced rejected donor blood from the local hospital, so even though he (mainly) bagged it, he had been drinking human blood for the last six months they had been together.
"Alright, alright, don't get your pants in a twist".
Spike snorted with laugher. "Er, think you mean don't get your knickers in a twist there love - if you're gonna talk English, at least get the saying right!!"
"Ha ha, laugh it up FangBoy!" Pulling himself out of Spike's arms, Xander shuffled towards the edge of the bed and stood up. "Whoa!!" A whole host of aches and pains reminded him how he had indeed spent the last evening and most of the day. Spike's desire to claim his human, inside and out, had required some dedication and effort, and Xander's back, thighs, arms, hips and yeah, his dick, were feeling rather overworked. He looked over his shoulder at Spike, who leered at him. Yeah, ok, so somebody had most definitely made their presence felt! As Spike's gaze travelled down his body, Xander could feel the blush start at his chest and rush to his face. His cock was valiantly trying to rise and his breath caught in his throat as he watched those blue eyes bleed to golden.
"Xander......" BRRNGG!!!!! "Bugger!" Shrugging forlornly, Xander shuffled over to the bedside table and picked up the phone.
"Hey Buff" Xander said, and Spike groaned - there went absolutely any chance he'd had of getting his boy back in bed. Pulling the quilt over his head, he inhaled the rich mixture of scents, whilst soaking up the warmth left behind by his human. He could still hear Xander speaking on the phone, and cursed in his head when he heard him say "ok, yeah, Magic Box at sunset" before putting down the phone.
"Spike? Spike - I know you heard that".
"Bugger off!"
"And there was I about to offer you some hot shower sex...... but if you're not interest......." before he could finish speaking, Xander found himself swept off his feet by a blond whirlwind and rushed into the bathroom. "Hey, Blondie, is it true vampire blood has restorative powers cos suffering human here"
"Yeah, it can do but did I ever tell you about the restorative powers of vampire spunk -"
"Spike!"
"You want me to what?!" Spike's voice echoed around the Magic Box, making Xander wince at the volume although he could understand the sentiment.
"Wesley has contacted me and let me know that they have successfully re-souled Angelus. He is quite desperately needed in their current circumstances, and, er, well the general consensus is that it would be most advantageous to all parties if you would, um, forego any vengeance you had planned". Giles did not look happy to be the one to have to put forward the suggestion a second time, having seen the emotional state Spike had been in following Angelus's evil prank.
"You have got to be fucking kiddin' me! First off they let the bog-trottin' wanker out with not so much as a by-your-leave to the people who might be affected! And now they want me to just say s'ok mate, attack my boy, smear his blood all over a fuckin' pig's heart and play your friggin mind games so I wanna walk into the sun but I forgive you cos you've got ya soul back and you're needed for the 'good' fight?" Spike had been getting more and more wound up as he spoke, stomping around the shop, arms waving madly in the air.
"Well in essence, yes, that would be erm an adequate summary, yes". Spike stared at him incredulously.
"Come on Xander, we're going". Spike grabbed Xander's hand, pulling him to his feet and moving towards the door.
"Hold it, Spike, you don't get to speak for Xander - " Buffy began, reaching over and grasping Xander by the wrist to keep him in place.
"You better let my boy go, Slayer - you don't wanna mess with me on this".
"No, YOU listen. Xander doesn't have to go with you - he isn't some sort of pet that you can drag around. And as for any revenge again Angel surely you can see - "
*I see nothing but your pathetic insistence that his effing soul makes some sort of difference!! Xander could have died and you weak sods just wanna let him get away with it?!" Tugging at Xander once more, Spike again tried to leave. Refusing to release her grip Buffy pulled harder, accidentally grabbing the sleeve of Xander's top and causing the collar to gape open.
"What the hell?!!!!" Leaping backwards, whipping a stake from her waistband, Buffy fell into a fighting stance facing Spike. "You bit him?!!"
"Shit!" said Xander stepping forwards between Buffy and Spike, determined that this was not going to end badly. "Buffy, wait, you need to understand..."
"Understand nothing - how the hell did he bite you Xander? Did the chip stop working?" She tried to edge sideways to get a clearer pathway to Spike but Xander followed her movements. "Giles, did the chip stop working - what's going on?"
Thanking God that Willow wasn't there - he could just imagine what a fubar that would make the entire situation - Xander held his hand palm up towards Buffy and Giles.
"Guys, it's not what you think..."
"Did - was it Angel who bit you?! But we would have seen it last night - Xander what is going on..."
"You need to back off Slayer - let the boy speak".
"Yes, thank you Spike - like we needed you to tell us that" Giles interjected sarcastically. "Now, if we could all calm down, perhaps we could ascertain exactly what is occurring. Am I correct in thinking that the chip has ceased to function?"
"S'right".
"And when did this occur?"
"Six months ago. Boy figured out how to get it to stop working and sorted it out for me. S'cleverer than you lot ever gave him credit for".
"Xander, no - I can't believe you would do that to us!"
"Buffy, I didn't do anything to you. The chip was just wrong - what the Initiative were doing was wrong. I believed that before Spike and I got together, and I had to do something about it, I just had to".
"For six months!?! And how many people has your lover killed while you've just stood by?!"
"BUFFY!" "OI" Giles and Spike shouted at the same time, both of them aware of how quickly the situation could degenerate into violence.
"He's not killing Buffy. In fact, most of the time he's on bagged human blood and the rest of the time there are plenty of bad guys out there..."
"And we're just meant to take your - HIS - word for that?! Oh my God, Xander, you are just so naive!" she laughed scornfully.
"No, Buffy I'm not. I stopped being naive about the time I had to stake my best friend days after you came to town". Xander's body language had changed - no longer defensive, now angry. "And yes, I believe Spike when he tells me that he's no longer killing innocents. And the bite - my bite - was with my full consent. But you'd know about that, right? About letting a vampire bite you?"
"So this goes back to me and Angel?! God, get over it already - "
"Oh please! Get over yourself. This is about me and Spike, about us being as close as two beings can be. And if anyone should know what sex with a vampire entails, it should be you." Throwing up his hands in frustration, Xander turned away. "This is pointless. Look, it doesn't matter about the chip being out - Spike and I are leaving town anyway. And as for Deadboy? We'll take what you said under advisement. Come on, Spike, let's go".
Smirking at the Watcher and the Slayer, Spike backed away towards the door. He could sense Xander's misery with the entire situation, but he couldn't pretend he wasn't happy to once more be feared - the Big Bad was back, and the Watcher and Slayer knew it. Yanking open the door, he bounced out of the shop.
"Xander, wait -"
"No, Buff, I think it's better for everyone if Spike and I just leave. Not leaving town straight away, but we'll be packing. Please - I'd like to be the one to tell Willow..."
"Oh my God, this will break Willow's heart!"
"Yeah, yeah I know". Head lowered, Xander held the door handle. "Please, Buffy, just think this through. Spike has been chipfree for months and he hasn't hurt you, or any of the gang. I won't be stuck in the middle between you and him any longer, but I would really like the chance to say goodbye properly and not be run out of town. Will you just think about it - for me?"
"Xander - "
"Yes, Xander - Buffy and I will talk and we will make the opportunity to sit down and discuss things properly", Giles interrupted. "But please - can you try and stop Spike from going after Angel - at least, not without giving us some sort of heads up?"
"Yeah, G-Man, I can try. I'll be in touch". So saying, he left the shop and walked towards Spike who was leaning against the wall, smoking a cigarette. "Spike - "
"Yeah Pet? "
"Can we just go home? Please? I don't wanna have to think - I just wanna go home". Flicking the cigarette away and throwing his arm over Xander's shoulders, Spike pulled him in tight and turned him in the direction of the car. His boy needed some TLC and he was more than happy to oblige. Xander accepted him exactly as he was - vampire, demon, poet, killer. He could do nothing less than accept his boy, complete with entanglements. The rest of them - the Slayer, the Watcher, the Witch, and even his helmet-haired tosser of a Sire - they could all just wait. Xander was more important than all of them.
Now let the night be dark for all of me.
Let the night be too dark for me to see
Into the future. Let what will be, be.'
Robert Lee Frost